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Feb 27

Cheesy

Categories:

humor

by Moby

I overheard a really cheesy pick up line leaving Starbucks today.  It was pretty obvious the guy used it at an attempt to be humorous.  The other guy obviously knew him as he laughed. 

Guy1: How have you been?

Guy 2: I am ok, good to see you.

Guy 1: You too.  Have I ever told you I have an itch that only you can scratch?

Guy 2: *laughs* 

It was funny but clearly not a really a good pick up line. lol  One of my favorites has always been:

Me: Do you have any cajun in ya?

You: No

Me: Do you want one?

What is one of your favorites?

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16 comments

  1. Sorata

    March 13, 2009 at 11:46 pm (UTC -7)

    I think I came a little reading Rich’s comment…

    I got picked up by my ex with:
    “I thought when I walk around and come back you will be less cute, but you are still just as cute.”

  2. Cb

    March 12, 2009 at 12:48 pm (UTC -7)

    I sorta like licking my finger seductively then touching it to their shirt. Followed up with the line, “I think we should get you out of those wet things.”

  3. Tony (LT)

    March 6, 2009 at 7:56 pm (UTC -7)

    “What are you doing that you oughta be doing with me?”

    or I just keep my mouth shut and drop my pecker in his cheerios.

  4. victor

    March 3, 2009 at 11:13 am (UTC -7)

    I always liked doing the “come here” finger curl to a guy across the bar. Then when he got to me, I’d say, “I made you come with my finger. Imagine what I could do with my dick.”

  5. Rich

    March 3, 2009 at 10:55 am (UTC -7)

    I generally just silently slip right up behind a guy, then I slide my hand around his waist, pass under the belt, then it’s right on down beneath his underwear band, up and around his cock. When I’ve clamped his junk tightly in my fist, and he makes like to try to pull away, I then dart my head like a whippet up to his cheek and press my wet lips into his ear canal, and hiss “Don’t you fuckin DARE fall in love with me till we at LEAST get into the car.”

    Works every time.

  6. Jeff

    March 1, 2009 at 3:05 am (UTC -7)

    This one actually works (shamelessly):

    “Ever have a hummer in a Hummer?”

  7. David

    February 28, 2009 at 6:28 pm (UTC -7)

    From when I used to manage a gay sex club here in NYC, said to a new cute patron.

    “Do you come here often? Would you like to cum here now?

    Must say it worked more than a few times.

  8. Christian

    February 28, 2009 at 8:38 am (UTC -7)

    “I have a tongue like an electric eel on speed and I can hold my breath for a very, very long time.”

  9. RG

    February 28, 2009 at 5:43 am (UTC -7)

    “Stick it in!” What? Too forward?

    Yeah, yeah, I shamelessly stole that line from Margaret Cho. So sue me.

  10. roboshogun

    February 27, 2009 at 10:08 pm (UTC -7)

    Nice shoes…. you wanna fuck? It even works if you switch up shoes with shirt!

  11. A Lewis

    February 27, 2009 at 7:46 pm (UTC -7)

    I’m with Kelly….. all I can think of is Brett. But, hey, whatever works!

  12. Bruce

    February 27, 2009 at 6:40 pm (UTC -7)

    “Why don’t you hop on the motorcycle behind me, and we’ll go for a ride?” said he. And I did, about a month later.

  13. ingvisson

    February 27, 2009 at 4:24 pm (UTC -7)

    The line I’ll never forget is, “Do you wanna come to my place and see my arachnids?” He had a whole menagerie of spiders, scorpions and Madagascar singing cockroaches. He let me pet his tarantula. It was cool.

  14. Blobby

    February 27, 2009 at 3:54 pm (UTC -7)

    ‘Can I buy you a beer?’ has always worked on me!
    Does that make me look cheap?

  15. Kelly Stern

    February 27, 2009 at 3:44 pm (UTC -7)

    That second one had to be from brettcajun…

  16. MathewPhilip

    February 27, 2009 at 2:44 pm (UTC -7)

    Me: Your ass is so hot, I’d like to spend my vacation there.

    Him: Okay!

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