I think I might be pregnant.  I’ve been craving a wide variety of foods lately but specifically candy.  I rarely eat candy beyond the weekly Hot Cookie venture.  Lately, I can’t seem to satisfy my sweet tooth.  Today’s sugary indulgence involved half a box of chocolate covered cherries. 

I got one of those home pregnancy thing-a-ma-jigs, the plus and negative sign both lit up when I passed it thru my stream.  I wonder what that means?  I went to the doc but he couldn’t help me.  He did the whole feeling-my-testicles and fingers-up-the-bum-then-cough sort of routine.  He didn’t really give me any results though.1 

My cardio has increased so I’m wondering if that might be it.  Can you get pregnant from doing too much cardio?  God, I hope not.  I so can’t afford a kid right now.  I mean come on, besides work, random trips to bb’s, and getting my hooves clipped and polished, I just don’t have money for a mini-Moby. 

What am I going to do if I am?  Should I get an abort-shun?  Do they sell a home kit for that too?  I could always give it up for adoption.  I was adopted and look how well it turned out for me.  *innocent smile*

Oh well, I guess I’ll figure something out.  I have to finish a chocolate almond bar, throw up, and pick out baby names.2



  1. I think I need a new dentist [↩]
  2. Yes, this post was written in jest.  I’m just being silly over my recent sweet tooth [↩]
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