WWMD (What Would Moby Do?)

I figured out what was going on with the pics.  It was a plugin.  I didn’t tinker with it but I did upgrade it yesterday.  It is the same plugin that allows me to restrict certain posts to regsitered users.  After pulling my hair (yeah, my hair) out for a couple hours this morning, I found the offending code and snipped it.   Anyway, on to today’s post.  

Over the years, I seem to have developed a rather consistent following of lurkers.1  I routinely get requests for advice, how-to, what-ifs, etc from this same group.  Being very open about my sexuality its often adult stuff but not always.  I figured why not start sharing?  heehee  Anonymous of course, don’t want to embarrass anyone.  I’ll try to do one every month but don’t get your knickers in a twist if I miss one.  Welcome to the very first WWMD!

Today’s question actually came in from several different readers so I figured it would be a good start. 

Q: How do you tell a guy you are not interested in him sexually? Or, how do you tell a guy you’ve been with once you aren’t interested in a repeat session.

A: I’m a big believer in honesty.  I find honesty to be the best policy in so many ways.  And while not always well-received at first, anyone worth their salt will respect you for it.  Plus, it does away with extended drama, uncomfortable exchanges later, and/or awkward public meetings.  You don’t have to be rude or ugly but you also don’t have to let the awkwardness or fear of alienation trick you into taking a less-honorable route. 

It may take a few attempts until you get the wording/phrasing down right as to not come off as rude.  You can even start out with telling the person you wanna be honest.  Don’t mislead the other person especially if they are “fishing”.2

This allows you to avoid being “the bad guy” or having to put up with someone else’s issues.  Being respectfully honest puts any issues squarely back in the other persons lap.  I know that sounds a bit callous but very relevant unfortunately.  And let me be frank, anyone who gets angry or irritated at you for being honest probably isn’t worth your time anyway. 

The other side of the coin is you might make a friend.  I’ve actually made several friends thru “encounters” that either didn’t go as planned or didn’t happen at all.  One particular friend comes to mind, I truly would have regretted not getting to know him.  

 

So there you have it.  The first official WWMD!  How’d I do?




  1. people who read often but never comment publicly []
  2. Using phrases meant to imply they want more, be it physical or emotional. []

12 thoughts on “WWMD (What Would Moby Do?)”

  1. I think you're right about being honest. But I find that it's nearly impossible for people to do! Even when one asks for complete honesty. I think we're afraid of confrontation, at all costs. And maybe its an underlying fear that there will be confrontation…?

    Enjoy reading your blog. No more lurking for me!

    @Jim ~ The funny part is we spend way more effort trying to avoid the confrontation than we'd ever spend just being honest.

  2. Btw is there a full list of your Moby-isms or do I have to F5 and contribute >1k PVs to check'em out? //lol

    Awesome quips.

    @jdneige ~ Unfortunately, no. I input them into a plugin which randomly churns'em out on every page load. I do need to update it though.

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