Perceive

It’s funny how some things strike a chord with people. My recent “strange” post seemed to resonate with more than a few of my readers. My friend B from Houston reached out to me to tell me how much he admired how honest I was. I was really taken with his email and warm emotion. I knew B back when I was living out of my car, working three jobs, including the tubs on weekends. He was always kind to me when I was working the tubs. He never looked down at me, belittled my work, or treated me in any way poorly. Don’t get me wrong, I knew my job wasn’t glamorous. And while I certainly didn’t brag, I never hid the fact. It was an honest living and it helped me get back on my feet. I have no problem admitting, then or now, that I worked in a bath house. Anyway, B and I stayed in contact over the years. Being a lover of bullies himself, he reached out to me when Spike passed. It meant so much to me that he did that.  His kudos to me in his email was a wonderful affirmation and I greatly appreciated it.

My buddy B1 from Colorado then reached out to me not even 24 hours later laughing about times we spent hanging out at “Cheesy-man” park on weekends. I used to drive down from Boulder and go rollerblading in the park. B was always cruising for a boy. He was also a very nice guy. He handled my polite rejection and built on it. We ended up being friends. He was also really touched by my post and reached out to me. His take was a tad different in that he loved that I’m always so direct. He loved to hear that I was still the same old ‘me’ all these years later.

When I wrote that post it was a total whim about a random yet humorous experience in my day to day life. I didn’t see it as anything significantly meaningful. But looking back on it I can see where some of the deeper meanings apply. I guess it’s a good sign that effective habits I struggled to have as a young man have taken root and become engrained. In my rambling I missed the significance of not letting someone else’s jaded behavior effect my own.

I confided in both B’s that I was tickled at how they perceived my post. They both found it very moving in their own way and I was just sharing my humor in it. As I told them both, I no longer question the idea of whether to post an idea here. Some things that I think will be revealing or insightful barely make a blip. Then something random like this really speaks to my readers. At the end of the day I just blog. If it strikes my fancy in it goes! The reasoning behind that is simple. I share because I can and because I never had anyone to share my struggles with as a kid. There were no blogs, no support groups, no internet, nada. Just knowing I wasn’t alone in my struggles would have made the pain so much more bearable for me back then. So yes, I do share in the hopes that my life stories will inspire, assure, or all around help others realize they are not alone.

As I am very fond of saying, hope springs eternal…

  1. Same letter, different person []

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