…the carbs!

I’ve been good so far which not being sucked into eating all the fatty holiday treats. Being detailed to the admin side at work creates a challenge as several folks routinely bring in treats to share. Said treats are almost always of the sugar or carb variety. lol

My fat ass is trying to slim down! I gained a ‘few’ lbs a while back and while I’ve lost most of them I’m bound and determined to get back down into a full size 32 jean.1 The ‘stretchy 32s’ I’m wearing now are fooling me. I dare not dream of a 31. My hips are too wide and I’d have to get really skinny to pull it off. I spent most of my teen years being so scrawny I gust of wind could blow me away, I have zero desire to ever be skinny again.

I don’t beat myself up other than routinely “feeling fat.”  I keep it in perspective as my struggle is minor to the very real struggle so many face to lose weight. I go thru my phases where I don’t ‘feel pretty‘ though. It’s mainly when I stop going to the gym consistently. I don’t actually feel fat, I feel flabby. All the tightness goes out of the muscles after a while and I hate it.

Anyhoo, back on point. I’ve been good so far at avoiding most of the holiday fatness. I apparently do it backwards because I always seem to be at my leanest during the holidays when everyone else is enjoying ‘the bulk’ or off-season. Some years I seem to be completely uninterested in anything fatty and others I find myself struggling to avoid practically everything that looks tasty.

I would blame the hubby’s penchant for fast food; however, that wouldn’t really be fair. I may not eat much fast food but I eat out more than he does usually. The calories still add up. I could go on and on about the struggle with my 10-hour days but I’ve already beat that horse into glue. My schedule is what I made it so I get to sucked it up or change it and changing it just isn’t practical right now.

I’ve already tweaked my workouts to avoid being in the gym for too long. I tend to get there just before the 5:00 rush. If I bust my hump and get Cooper walked and head out the door, I can be finishing up just when it starts getting crazy. Our gyms here are small by most standards and the Castro gym is hella over-sold so it is often just a royal pain to try and get thru a solid workout w/o wanting to cut a bitch for playing on his phone instead of working out.

I’m off-topic, again! Lawd where is my brain today. If you’re struggling like me, I feel for ya. Hang in there. Take it one success (or failure) at a time. I find when I don’t give up after “splurges”, I eventually get there. I’ve given in and made cardio a consistent part of my routine. I’m not as active on weekends like I used to be in my single days2 so cardio is a necessity now. Some days I go the high-intensity route and others it’s slow grind on the stationary bike or treadmill. Either way, I begrudgingly admit it helps.  I ate like a pig for thanksgiving and I’ve lost the several lbs I put on already. I’m back in my “safe” zone but as mentioned I want to be leaner.

The struggle is real bitches!

  1. I’m hovering between 33/34 []
  2. primarily because I was out being a filthy whore []

Feeling chatty?