This is my last weekend off before heading back home. I won’t have much time for socializing but I am looking forward to seeing a few friends.

Today was very low key. Had a nice lunch date w/my friend Michael. He was a saint considering he’d just come from having his teeth worked on at the dentist. We took in a movie afterwards. Of course, once again, Tanifa and her husband sat on the same isle as us and proceed to have several conversations on her cellphone. She was quite enough I didn’t have to clown her about it. Annoying nonetheless.

Later, I was off to the Powerhouse for the BCC charity contest. Good contestants again this week so made for a fun evening. (Oh and btw, thanks Tim for telling me you were leaving. I spent 20 minutes rubbing heads in the backroom looking for you. None of them turned out to be you so I left. :-P) There was the total fucking hottie that came in right towards the end. Nice looking guy, 6’2″ bald head, masculine, good shape, and just oozing sexuality. Gave me a few looks but could never tell if he was really interested or just being nosy. Of course, as soon as I managed to extricate myself from the group to walk by and say hi, he left. I was miffed but will survive. *sniffle* Aaaaannyway, I’ll have a few pics to post by Sunday. The photographers alway get shots of me but I never post them. As stated previously, I’m making an effort to add photos to the blog.

From Pics to Spam

Ok, I’m over my bathroom kick, at least for awhile. So, todays madness is about pics. I’ve gotten a couple of emails asking for more pics of me. I’ve been contemplating adding a photoblog here but since I’m considering folding the blog into my domain, it doesn’t really make much sense to go thru all the effort just to change it again. Being lazy, I just changed my profile pic. Oy! What a mug huh? Face like that could crack glass.

Speaking of pics, why is it people feel the need to lie or hide their identities online? I won’t even go into online dating/sex sites where guys use fake pics to hook up for nookie. No, we’ll tuck that rant away for a rainy day. Most of my buddies think its from a secret desire to be anonymous and naughty at the same time. I guess that makes sense but, you really aren’t being anonymous. Your IP address can be traced back to you along w/your name and address. (For those non-techie folks, IP stands for internet protocol. Its a string of numbers, unique to you, your computer uses to identify you on the network. ) These numbers are easy to look up for free even to a novice internet user. And most people seem to know this but fall prey to the mentality “oh it won’t happen to me.” Or, if they can’t see it happening, they don’t really think much about it. Of course, this probably explains why viruses spread so quickly. I know some of you are thinking, “no, that can’t be right. No, he doesn’t know what he is talking about.” Ok, well here is a classic example of how Porn sites magically get your information.

Step 1. You visit Site A. Your browser is set to accept cookies. (you know it is) Part of the cookie is your IP address. BAM! They have you right there. They ping your IP to discover your name/home address and add you to their snail mail spam list. It is really that easy.

Step 2. You visit Site B. Your browser is set to accept cookies. This time, the cookie looks for your personal info you filled out when you bought the PC. Yes, they do that, and its perfectly legal. BAM! You could now begin getting snail mail and email spam AND if you filled out your home phone number, they can now CALL you w/more spam.

So the next time you log onto your favorite porn site, remember someone is watching!

Gym & Tramps

Let see, how should I start this one. Nothing comes to mind so I guess I’ll dive right in. For those of you who know me, you know I’m a total horndog so this is no surprise to you. For those who don’t, well brace yourself, this is a bit of an adult rant today. *smile*

So I’m cruising this guy at the gym. He is just scrumptious from my point of view. . . 5’6″ italian mix of some sort. Tight lean frame and yeah THAT was nice too. *G* He always acts like he’s interested so I thought today was the day. I’m done w/my workout, (triceps – day from hell) and I’m showering up when he walks by gives me an up/down look as if to say “hello – drop to your knees”. I’m like wahooo! So then he slips into the steam room to hang out. I follow of course. And it goes like this for about 30mins. From shower to steam room and back again. Getting a bit annoyed, I corner him and ask him if he wants to come over since I’m only a block away. His response “is it safe over there?” …uh, well I’m a block away, how bad can it get? I didn’t really know what to say so I said, “yes, I’m just a block away”. So now he is all skiddish and stand offish giving off totally mixed signals. Of course, this ruins the spontaneity of it for me.

I just don’t get fags sometimes. Why go thru all the effort of showing someone you are into them and then back out? And the fucker was obviously interested cause he got a stiffy several times. Oh well, its not like I’m starving for it. Christ, this is SF after all. You can get laid checking the mail.

Well, thats my rant for now. I’m home “in the mood” after being disappointed by Mr. Hottie. I wonder if I can order in…

Ding Dong The Witch is Dead!

** This was copied from my old journals and I’ve tried to condense it for clarity **

It finally happened! My stepmother is dead! Satan has left us once again for the underworld. May she reign in hell forever undisturbed.

This news is so completely unexpected as she is 10yrs younger than my dad. On top of that, they still don’t know what killed her. She went to bed one night and just didn’t wake up. It was your conscience that killed you, you mean spirited hateful bitch! (Yes, I’m bitter, and I have good reason. If you haven’t read the history, please do so now.)

I just got home from work and I’m so giddy w/laughter I can’t control myself. I know I shouldn’t be happy over someone’s death but I can’t help it. She was the bane of my existence for so long, I can’t help but be happy. She made my life a living hell as a child. Anything cruel or mean she could think of to do to me, she did. It has taken me years to work thru the anguish, feelings of inadequacy, and self-doubt that she instilled within me sometimes daily.

I have such a feeling of relief. As if a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders. My belief is that, for whatever reasons, she was a miserable person in this life. A person who couldn’t be happy so tried to make everyone around her just as miserable as she was. All my puns aside, I hope that she has found some sort of relief from her grief. Maybe in her next life she’ll come back as a gay man adopted by white trash and they’ll kick her to the curb at the ripe age of 14.

I’m going out to celebrate tonight. I plan on getting snockered up real good!

****this is a from a journal entry about a week later****
They discovered what killed my step mother finally. Apparently, she had taken a whole slew of pills again (she was a severe pill addict) and some of the pills interacted and backed up into her esophagus. She basically choked to death in her sleep. Hows that for irony? I still say it was her conscience.

Chance Encounters

On a completely shallow note, something funny happened today. I guess I should start out w/a little background history. I used to be very skinny. I mean bone skinny. I’ve been working really hard these last few years to really put on some muscle. Especially, this last year. And I have to say . . . its working. I’ve gained almost 2 inches on my chest and arms since January. I’m very proud of myself. Anyway, back to the story.

There is this guy I see at the gym often. I used to “cruise” him and he always gave me the cold shoulder. And not just indifference but sort of rude/snubby sort of way. So today, he comes up to me, asks my name, and wants to know if I’d like to “get together” sometime. (thats “lets boink” in hoe language)

The reason I bring it up is I was torn in my response. I wasn’t sure to be snubby and return the same cold shoulder he always gave me or to accept. I’m curious to see what others would do in the same scenario. I admit I’m still very attracted to him yet a part of me resents him for only wanting to know me now. It wasn’t like I was fat before or overly pushy in my “cruising”. I’m pretty quick on the uptake, if you don’t show any interest, I look elsewhere. What would you have done?