Birth’ed

Well, it’s official boys and gurls. Yours truly is 41 years old. [1]Or, 39.95 + tax   Strange, as I don’t feel 41. Well, that’s half true. Age and wisdom has certainly given me some perspective. Not to mention, the grey is slowly creeping its way down my body. lol That said, I still don’t feel it. It’s hard to explain. I guess you can say I’ve held only my youthful outlook on things.

I don’t make a big fuss over my birthdays. I guess when I get to an age that is uncommon then I can make a bit to-do over it. Until then, I try to spend quality time with friends. This weekend I’m catching the new Underworld with a group and then Boys for Balls (charity bowling event). It promises to be a fun weekend.

I’m still very optimistic about the future and look forward to life. That is a good thing IMHO.

References

References
↑1 Or, 39.95 + tax

Tran?

Would someone mind telling me when the word tranny became offensive? I’m not being sarcastic here, I’m honestly confused. Most of my life-long exposure to the word has been inside the community and in a simple descriptive slang. I’ve asked the few I know [1]including a FTM coworker and not a single one had a problem with the word in general. They also seemed a bit perplexed as to why it is suddenly only meant in the derogatory sense. If they don’t have a problem with it, why then do the groups that claim to represent us have such an issue with it?

I bring it up today as there’s been quite a bruhaha in social media outlets as of late, specifically gay media outlets. And the outrage and moral hand-ringing seems to be over people from within the LGBT community using the word in a clearly positive sense. I’d be a little more understanding if it was coming from some yahoo w/no brain spouting off out of ignorance. But from within our community? I’m confused.

First of, everyone deserves respect, including the T part of the LGBT umbrella. I’m currently just questioning the methodology. And the idea that I might question it does not mean I am not for transgendered rights. But, before I jump on the “Oh no you dinn’t just say that?” bandwagon, I need more than just a group jumping all over anyone who dares to use the word in any context. If the word has become so bad, why are we just hearing about it now and why aren’t these same agencies educating us in the LGBT community? Jumping all over anyone who uses the word, even when well-meaning, is certainly not the answer.

Words have power, no dispute there, but one should also look at the intent behind the word as much as the word itself. While not diminishing the very real pain a person can feel when spoken to in a degrading way, not every use of a word is derogatory. Frankly, over-reacting to every use of the word also diminishes your effort and gives you the appearance of whining. Our brethern in the black community have co-opted a slang version of the N-word and made it their own. While it can and does still have negative meanings, they are actively taking back the power of its use.

I wonder if our own over use of the word within the LGBT community has spawned its use on a much larger scale. As LGBT folks become more accepted and mainstream, it seems a natural progression that our slang would be picked up by straights. How they use it could be based on intent and/or ignorance. If that is the case and the word is becoming deragatory I could understand all the fuss. I’d also fully support efforts to stop using it. I would never support treating a transgendered person any different than I’d treat anyone else.

I also can’t hep but wonder if it is because we in the LGBT community use it as slang that in its self makes it unacceptable. Sorry, but that would be way beyond political correctness and would push me away from supporting anyone who tried to sell it. I also think it would be extremely counter-productive to the fight for transgendered equality. While being transgendered is fundamentally different than being gay/straight, the right to and the fight for acceptance is the same. Trying to distinguish a separation between us is futile to the outside world. Our focus should be on the acceptance of everyone, regardless of their race, creed, gender, orientation, etc. Otherwise, what’s the point of including the T in the LGBT acronym?

On a tangent of the above, is this a preemptive attempt to prevent the word from becoming derogatory? My understanding of the word tranny is that it has more to do with gender-benders and drag queens than being transgendered. It is very plausible the outside world would miss that very important distinction. Is this the transgendered communities attempt to either distance themselves from the word or prevent it from taking hold as descriptive slang for transgendered folk? I can see the reasoning there but I still think it would be a futile and needless battle. While the LGBT community might pick up on it, the outside world would fail to see the distinction. To me, this also smacks of the all or nothing mentality. History has shown this approach rarely, if ever, succeeds.

IMHO, a united approach is and will always be the best approach for all of us in the fight for equality. I don’t know how many of my readers, if any, are transgendered, but I welcome everyone’s feedback/comments on this issue. I’m not claiming to be right here, just confused.

References

References
↑1 including a FTM coworker

Extra Large

Nothing dirty, get your mind out of my gutter. But you should be logged in if you’re not.

Has anyone noticed that t-shirt sizes seem to be shrinking and pant sizes seem to be growing? WTF is up with that? lol I was recently shopping for a zip-up hoodie and none of the sizes fit me. I had to end up getting an extra-large. While I’m first to admit I’ve put on some muscle in the last 10 years, I’m not that damn big. And for some odd reason, clothing manufacturer’s never seem to make t-shirts the same size across brands. Even when shopping within the same brand, I often find I have to check sizes. It drives me nuts. I’m what I like to call a hybrid shopper. I like to shop but I don’t like wasting tons of time trying on clothes, especially for t-shirts. Once I become familiar with a brand, I like knowing I can grab a shirt I like, hit the checkout, and be done with it.

It is frustrating as hell to try to shop for shirts because you have to try every single freaking shirt on before you buy it. And then hope/pray it doesn’t shrink, even when it’s not supposed to, after you wash it. [1]That’s a whole other pet-peeve! Why can’t they do like shoe companies and show a size based on what country the shoe is being sold in? While I still try on shoes before I buy, I never have to jump sizes. A size 10 is always a size 10 (with only a small difference between shoes and boots). Oh and even worse, when you buy cheap shirts, it is just the opposite. You buy a small and it drags your knees! lol

References

References
↑1 That’s a whole other pet-peeve!

Knock

So I’m checking my blog stats the other day and my log-in tracker was so long it almost crashed the browser. lol Apparently, a crack engine [1]code for a rogue server trying to crack user passwords w/repeated random attempts over and over and over… burned thru over 500 attempts to log into my blog via the default admin account. As mentioned in a several previous posts, one should always disable this default and create a separate more secure one. Anyway, the default account has been locked for some time so all the attempts failed. I’ve since banned the IP’s, not that it does any good as they just rotate thru those too.

Speaking of, I did notice quite a few regular user log-ins. I was a little surprised at how many of you still use your old trusted log-ins here. Since I am single again, you can expect some use to come from having said log-ins. hehehe.  I’ll be posting in said areas again from time to time.

On a side note, my buddy Large Tony has a new blog link. He decided to retire his West of Mayberry for the newer Third Leg. hehehe  If you’re a fan, update your links accordingly. Large Tony has been my biggest referral generator for months and months now so it’s the least I can do to return the favor. Not to mention he is an all around good guy. Here’s to another year of funny, insightful, poetic, and often erotic posts from Big T.

References

References
↑1 code for a rogue server trying to crack user passwords w/repeated random attempts over and over and over…

Resolute Poot

So 2011 is over and I couldn’t be happier to see it go. I was off from work this year for NYE, thankfully. My NYE consisted of sushi early enough to avoid the crowds and cheesy/funny kung-fu movies on the TV with Cooper passed out next to me. I caught the ball-drop on Tivo.

It was an absolute shitty year for me personally and I’m more than ready for 2012, our last year together. [1]According to the lunies, the world will end this year because the Mayan’s decided to stop counting at 2012. It’s been one shitstorm after another this year: the relationship ending, pay cuts at work, Spike getting sick and then later having to be put to sleep, and not to mention my debt.  I’m hopeful 2012 will be better for me. I’d never say it can’t get worse but I sure hope not. lol

My only resolution this year is to focus on getting my life back together. I’m faced with some difficult choices in the next couple months. As mentioned, I have a few blog posts backed up from the WordPress snafu. Once those roll out, the blog might go dark for a few weeks until I get things sorted. It all depends on how things go.

The one bright spot in 2011 was the arrival of little Cooper. He brings me joy every day. Speaking of, he has also settled in quite well to his new home. One has only to observe the changes in his behavior to know he is happy and content. He is still having potty episodes but they are getting farther and farther apart. [2]Here’s hoping my carpet survives! lol Of course, he still farts like a demon that’s been gang-banged by a stink bomb. Seriously, I’m surprised the paint isn’t pealing yet. heehee Regardless, I love him.

On a side rant, it is amazing how much joy and contentment an animal can bring to one’s life. Growing up the way I did, I tend to be very independent. But I tell you this, having an animal with such unconditional love and faith in me is very rewarding. And, I honestly think if he were not around I would have slipped back into depression over the current state of things.

Anyway, here’s to our last year together. I hope everyone had a pleasant and safe holiday season. Best wishes to you all in 2012! And as I am sometimes fond of saying, ‘hope springs eternal!‘

References

References
↑1 According to the lunies, the world will end this year because the Mayan’s decided to stop counting at 2012.
↑2 Here’s hoping my carpet survives! lol

Spirit

I must admit I’m having trouble finding the holiday spirit this year. I’m actually more than ready for this year to be over. It’s been a horrible year overall and I’m happy to see it go.

It doesn’t help that I’m once again in debt up to my eyeballs. For the last 6 months I’ve been hemorrhaging money like a stuck pig. It just seems like one thing after another keeps popping up. The irony is when I started this blog over 7 years ago I was in much the same situation. How’s that for a kick in the pants? You’d think I’d have learned by now. lol A huge chunk came from dealing w/my Dad’s estate after he died. Due to some legal loopholes in property law in TX, I couldn’t get a clean title for the little chunk of land he left my brothers and I. None of my brothers have a pot to piss in so I ended up shouldering the largest chunk of the legal burden to sort it all out. Five years and $22k in legal fees, its over and done with.

Don’t get me wrong, I am grateful to have what I do have. I have a roof over my head, job stability, relatively good health, and a doggie that loves me to death. I know there are many folks out there who can’t claim the same thing. That being said, all the stress and worry has sapped my spirit. Sometimes it really sucks having responsibilities. lol I guess I can be grateful w/o the spirit this year.

Anyway, I hope you all have a safe and warm holiday, whatever you celebrate.

Oopsie

While I don’t worry much about my blog comments, I have been a little surprised by the absolute lack of any comments at all lately. I discovered today that would be because the last 5 posts got sent to the draft folder on my server instead of being published! lolol I guess in the switchover back to a PC [1]more on that later my xmlrpc file on the server got confused. I reset the file and it seems to have corrected the problem. I’ll roll out the posts over the next week or so vs all at once.
In doggie news, Cooper [2]he now has his own Google+ and FB profiles, links to follow. is adjusting quite well. His behavioral problems have all but disappeared. Ironically, the one thing we thought would be an easy transition has been the hardest…his potty training. After the first week, he took to peeing (and sometimes poohing) on the carpets when we weren’t around. We tried a few techniques but have finally started to crate him when we aren’t home. The poohing has stopped but the pee episodes still occur. I hate doing it but he needs to learn the rules. This is the most effective method and given time will make him happier. He has clearly been in a crate before as he didn’t whine at all the first night he spent in the crate. December 22 will be his first full month with us and I couldn’t be happier. [3]I expect many of you to remember 11.22.11. Notice the cute pattern? He is a joy to have and be around and brings me lots of smiles. I look forward to him being there when I get home at night. No matter how awful my day has been, seeing him always makes me happy. I’m not sure who gets the most out of the time we spend together, him or me. hehehe
We’ve noticed Cooper definitely has some peculiar habits. One of the funniest is when he crawls off the sofa. He uses just his front feet and literally drags his back-end off onto the floor. Its hysterical to watch. Other times, when he lays down he will walk next to something, like the sofa, and literally just throw himself sideways onto the floor. His newest habit is crawling over me up onto the arm of the sofa to look out over the room. It took him a few tries to get his balance right so he wouldn’t fall. He only seems to do it when I’m actually on the sofa. I like the fact he has odd habits, it makes him more unique in my eyes.

References

References
↑1 more on that later
↑2 he now has his own Google+ and FB profiles, links to follow.
↑3 I expect many of you to remember 11.22.11. Notice the cute pattern?

Civil

I’m just home from taking the entrance exam for my promotion. The test was relatively straight-forward.  Sixty multiple choice questions asking basically silly answers. Most were easy to guess even with no knowledge whatsoever. There were only 3 that I wasn’t 100% of the best possible answer. Regardless, I am confident I did well. This was step 1. Step 2 is the oral interview. Step 1 & 2 determines where I rank on the list of candidates. Ranking high is good but not necessarily a guarantee.  The current position is ‘rule of the list’ which means the department can pick and choose from anyone on the list, regardless of where they rank, to fill vacant positions.

There is a dirty rumor circulating that the dept really wants me to promote.  Promotion would effectively eliminate one of their biggest opponents during disciplinary hearings. As the Chief Steward for our local union chapter, I am often called to rep/defend employees up for discipline/suspension. Not to sound arrogant, but I am very good at what I do. A dept with a history of inept management has had to step up their game considerably since I came along. lol If I were to promote, it would mean I’d have to resign my post as it would represent too much of a conflict of interest. I think I could handle the two jobs  objectively but even the appearance of partiality is not good.  It would be better for me to step aside. Frankly, I’m a bit tired of it anyway. I’ve been doing it for almost 7 years now and I’m more than a little burned out. 

While I’m flattered by the rumor, I don’t much stock in it. I think more astutely the department thru our interactions has come to respect and accept my abilities. I think this, more than anything, would be their reasoning for choosing me (if chosen). I am tenacious and thorough but I’m also fair-minded. I am a big believer that the punishment (if any) should fit the offense. Many civil service agencies follow the rule of progressive discipline. I am not a big fan of such a rule because some offenses can be worse than others and the idea that every offense has to be meted with continually severe punishment is retarded. You cannot manage people as a resource the same way you’d manage objects.

I’m still a bit ambivalent on the whole process. I’m committed to seeing it thru, regardless of the outcome though. Worst case, I can demote back to my position within 12 months w/no loss of seniority.

Woof

In case you’ve been living under a rock, encased in a food coma from Thanksgiving, or just happened to miss it, I got a new doggie last week!

Meet little Cooper (aka Roman). I ask you, how could you not love that face? He is 16 months old and a rescue. His name was originally Norman but that was so boring (for a dog). We decided to try a few names out and find one that fit. Roman was my first choice and Apple guy came up with Rio or Cooper. Well, the doggie seems to be responding to Cooper so looks like we’ll be going with that. I’m not sure if it’s the phonetics or strong consonant sounds but he does seem to like it.

I was vocally apprehensive about getting another dog. Apple guy had expressed an interest in getting another one a few times. I was slowly coming around. Frankly, I think he also got tired of me bursting into tears every time I saw a bulldog on the street. He put in the application to rescue Cooper and as luck would have it, we got him. At the time he did it, I was still a bit undecided over the idea. That being said, it got stuck in my craw like a piece of gravel. As they days went by it became all I could think of. I kept asking every other day if he’d heard anything. Finally, impatience got the best of me and I emailed the rescue site. To my delight, they replied back the same evening with the news he was still available and we just needed to pick a time to come see him.

We drove up to Folsom, CA to meet him and it was truly love at first sight. He came bouncing into the room so full of energy and excitement my heart just melted. Up until that moment, I was still apprehensive about getting a new dog. Even months later, I still can’t talk about Spike for more than few minutes without tearing up and getting profoundly sad. I still miss him very much and not a day goes by that I don’t think of him in some fashion. He was only in my life for a short time but had such a profound effect on me. Surprisingly, I don’t feel guilty like I thought I would. Even with the new pup, I still remember and miss Spike. He is not forgotten nor replaced in my heart. I’m happy to know I can love a new doggie w/o forgetting him.

So little Cooper was an owner-surrender. We didn’t get a whole lot of details on why the previous owner gave him up. They did mention he came to them a little malnourished. He was also shedding a tad more hair than he should be. Otherwise, he was in good condition. He is adapting quickly to his new home and already seems happy. He is a little ball of energy to say the least! I mean it, he bounces around like a ping-pong ball. lol I think he has some separation-anxiety from being left alone a lot. He constantly follows us around. It could just be that he hasn’t any stability in his life or a little of both. Either way, we’ve been giving him lots of lovin’ and attention.

Apple guy jokes that he is the bad parent because he is often more strict with him than I am. I’ll admit I don’t like being harsh with him but I do put my foot down when the need warrants it. He might learn slower my way but I still think he’ll learn. Both of us have been making sure to reward good behavior and admonish bad behavior. He’s only had 1 potty accident so far. This weekend I’m going out bedding shopping, one for the living room and one for the bedroom. That way he can choose where he likes to sleep. While we have been letting him lay on the couch, I won’t let him in the bed. He still sheds quite a bit. I’ll deal with doggie hair anywhere except the bed. Plus, he needs his own little spot to call his own.

So there you have it. For all my rants, I’m happy to have him. He will have a happy life and most definitely be loved.

Big Load

You were so thinking something dirty weren’t you? lol
Am I the only one that has become desensitized to FB and Twitter? It just seems to be so much random info that I have begun tuning it all out. FB drives me absolutely nuts. The new layout is horrific and not at all user friendly. Not to mention, they sprung new ‘groups’ on my friend lists which annoyed the holy hell out of me. And on top of that, I got a lovely message from FB last week telling me they are phasing out RSS feed support. That means no more posts from my blog showing up on FB. I can still manually cross post them of course but that defeats the purpose. I’m not sure who is in charge at FB but from my perspective they are putting nail after nail in their own coffin. I’ve completely stopped adding new people on FB unless it’s someone I actually know. And it’s fine that they are phasing out support. I can share once from Google+ and bounce it out to Twitter and FB at the same time so take that bitches.
I think I spend more of my time on Google+ these days primarily because the streams are more about data vs crap. People share funny, cutesy stuff galore but I’m also finding tons of news links as well. And the sharing just seems more intuitive to me. I’m also being careful on how many folks I follow or circle. I’m trying really hard to avoid info overload again. Its actually been quite nice logging on and only having to sift thru 10-20 updates compared to 100’s.

As an early-adopter I’m not at all dismayed by the current small amount of updates. This will change once Google starts releasing more API’s for developers to integrate with Google. Its a double-edged sword but it really does seem as if Google is moving into Plus being centric to the entire Google experience. The changes across their many services already indicate a gradual shift to total integration, which I love! Even better, managing, using, and updating is so much easier and nicer than FB. Twitter still gets props for being the easiest site to update but its a one-trick pony and Google has a whole stable.