Texting

I’m going to "come out" as a grammatical texter; meaning I like to use grammar and punctuation while texting. I’m going to go one step further and say, I do not understand people who feel the need to send gibberish because they are too lazy to type out what they are saying. And don’t get me wrong, I use common abbreviations and sometimes even emojis, but I like text I can understand.

One friend said I’m just getting old and maybe so, but I like to be understood. And if you are too lazy to type, what else are you too lazy to do? Hmmmmm? I have a buddy from the gym who’ll text me a string of emojis and I’m like, "huh?" He’ll do an eye roll emoji and resend it with enough real words I can understand it. I asked him how often he misunderstands texts from others done in the same style and he begrudgingly admitted often. So…if you have to routinely resend texts, why not put a little extra effort into the first try?

I’ll be starting a support group for fellow GT’s like myself … šŸ™‚

Zombie Rage

If ya know me, you know I’m not a religious person. In my opinion, organized religion has become a cancer in society. It should be excised from daily life or discussions. Like your private parts, it should be shared only when asked. . .

I posted a pic of the hubby and I to FB this past weekend of us at the park enjoying the day. It was the Hunky Jesus celebration that usually happens every year in SF for Easter. [1]Excepting covid years. We had a friend in town and wanted to hang out with him. Since he wanted to go to the park, we tagged along.

Anyway, Karen proceeds to send me this long rant on FB Messenger telling me how offensive it is to refer to Jesus as a Zombie. So I replied, “1) it’s a joke, 2) I don’t believe in your Jesus, 3) I don’t care.” I had neither the time nor inclination to discuss the hilarious ironies she was so clearly missing.

That apparently REALLY set her off! *giggle* She went on an even longer rant about how evil and perverted gay people were and basically nailed every broken stereotype possible to try and offend me. Rather than waste any real effort on this gem of a human being, I replied, “perhaps you should look up the Hunky Jesus contest in San Francisco ma’am.” She apparently did and came back with a short but varied list of our evils and horrible ways I was going to die.

Moral of the story? Don’t troll random people on the internet because of “your beliefs.”

References

References
1 Excepting covid years

Broken

I think I broke FB’s algorithm. heehee Or at least I hope so. I’ve been limiting my daily use for some time now. Lately, I’ve noticed the app displays the same content for days vs a random refresh every time I open it.Ā  My thought process is the app thinks I haven’t viewed enough of my feed so it keeps showing me the same content hoping I’ll doom scroll thru it. You’d think it knows I almost always view my feed using the “recent” view option.Ā 

Of course, it could just be yet another bug in the app they never seem to stop updating. They get it working fine and randomly a “security update” for the app rolls out and everything goes nuts for a week or so. The same thing has started happening with IG too.Ā 

I’m not sure why I’m so tickled. I just find it humorous.Ā it’s the little things I guess…

Fine

I’ve been so serious here as of late so I thought I’d share something funny that happened to me this past week.

An attorney calls up one day a couple weeks ago about a records request we had produced for him. One of the discs had some erroneous data on it. No biggie, while rare it does happen, we made a mistake. We promptly sent him a new copy.

Fast forward to this past week. The guy calls back and this time one of the discs is blank, or so he says. I’m a bit less cordial (without being rude) this time as I begin to suspect he is playing us. It isn’t unheard of for an attorney to try and get one over on our office for a variety of reasons. Being devious, I offer him the option to swing by and drop off the disc so I can give him the new one vs making him wait while we mail him yet another disc. Now our lobby is currently closed to the public due the pandemic, but with the lower cases lately we have some discretion. And in my head I’m thinking I’m going to catch him in a big lie. Well, the joke ended up being on me.

He swings by and I get a call from the Sheriff desk he is here. I put on my best bitchy “I caught you in a lie” face and head down. And then it all just falls apart. I first had to pick my jaw up off the floor as the MF’r was FINE as hell!Ā  I mean, “drop an egg and it roll down my pants” fine! I mean slap yo momma fine! He was stunning! Imagine Tom Ellis from the show Lucifer, but a bit shorter, dark blond hair, piercing green eyes, a slightly stronger jaw line covered in stubble and slightly more bulging muscles. He is wearing a well fitted shirt/tie with slacks. I actually caught my breath because I was so utterly shocked. If I had pearls I definitely would have clutched them in that moment. hehehe It was made worse by his completely calm and friendly demeanor, no gaydar pings unfortunately. He was nice and had these big paw like hands on him as he reached to shake my hand. (We aren’t supposed to shake hands but lawd baby jeebus I’ve had my shots and I couldn’t help myself.) I tend to have a firm handshake and guys will often comment on it. He did comment and I melted like butter inside. You could have scraped me off the floor.

And sure enough the disc was blank. So then I felt about two feet tall for thinking the worst and was falling all over myself to apologize, all the while taking in the breath-taking display that is this M-A-N! It is made worse because I think I actually felt myself blushing, which is just not something I do. As I repeatedly try to untie my tongue, I hand off the disc and he has an ever so slight humorous smirk on his face. Of course, I turn away quickly so he cannot see my full on blushing! I pretend I’m coughing so I can recover myself. Once I feel I’m at least not bright red, I turn to thank him one last time as he saunters away with his damn near perfect butt bouncing in those slacks.

I go back upstairs to collect myself and I’m quite sure the cleaning crew had to be called to clean up the slime trail I’m sure I had left in my wake. lolol I don’t know if it was the isolation, the testosterone boost from being back in the gym, my naturel gregarious nature, or all of the above, but I was flustered for a good 15 minutes after it was over. I’m sure he delights in knowing he has that affect on women and men as his smirk looked positive and had that knowing realization with it. Hell, it’s been days since it happened and I think I still might need a moist towelette after I finish this post. [1]TFA if you are reading this post, remember the first time we met? Yeah, I would have begged him too!

Of course, I had to call my husband and laugh with him and then blow up my coworkers texts on her day off to thank her for the blank disc she sent him. I was so tickled and it was a definite mood booster for the rest of the day.

Even an old dog like me can get flustered at times. Now you know…

References

References
1 TFA if you are reading this post, remember the first time we met? Yeah, I would have begged him too!

50

Well, the terrible day has arrived. I’m 50! (Yes, I’m totes joking)

As I’m fond of saying, I’ve reached ancient in gay-years. I’m an elder now. It is time for to don my robe, take up my staff, and take a seat on theĀ #alphabetmafia council. (If you are on TikTok, you know where that phrase came from. I love it!) I mean those free toasters aren’t always enough to swell our ranks, am I right? Apparently, I’m supposed to have lost interest in a whole host of activities I’m still participating in. [1]Maybe now that I am on the council of elders, I’ll be able to get my memos more regularly.) ) To be honest, I don’t feel 50. Well, parts of me feel 50 but overall, I don’t feel it. … Continue reading day. I’m hoping the Biden/Harris inauguration goes off without too much drama.

I joke but I know a lot of gay men struggle with aging. Our community isn’t always the kindest to older gays. I’ve never minded my age or aging. And considering for a few reasons, I never thought I’d even reach 50, I’m perfectly fine with it. Sure, there are times I might feel the sting of being less attractive or less appealing as years past, but those things are superficial. I try to take it in stride. My life was a tragic rollercoaster ride before I made it to 25, so 50 has been an easy target.

I can actually remember one time when I was still new to blogging wondering what I would be doing if I made it to 50. In my mind it was a far off place full of disbelief and what-ifs. lololĀ  Well, here I am. I like to think I’m a better man than I was back then. I certainly struggled along the way. I am a little proud that I am still blogging, albeit nowhere near as often. I took to blogging like it was made for me back then. This blog has been a priceless tool in my journey of self-discovery. I credit so much of my emotional growth to this medium.

As I hit the half centennial mark, I do realize the scope of my age and the breadth of changes in me, my life, and the world around me. I mean, I am old enough to remember Pong after all. There was not internet when I was a kid. There was no cell/smart phones, WIFI, Bluetooth, or social media. Hell, even 911 didn’t exist until I was in high school. Cars didn’t have seatbelts, gasoline was less than a dollar per gallon, TV’s had less than 10 channels with no remote control. Cassette tapes were the size of a small tablet and restaurants still had “smoking or non” in one room. The world has jumped far ahead in technology. Sadly, I’ve witnessed many of the very tools meant to unite us only serve to divide us further.

I’m not feeble just yet but I can’t push myself like I used to when I was a wee lad. That would probably be my only regret at this point. I’m still pretty fit, covid-19 times considered, but the body isn’t as resilient. I’m eagerly headed back to the gym (outdoors) this coming weekend. I had several minor injuries in 2019 that plagued me throughout the whole year. It made me realize I’m not as spry and flexible as I used to be. That said, I look forward to more years in the gym.

I have never been huge on birthdays so not much is planned. I have to work for one. With the covid-19 restrictions still very much in effect, I’ll probably end up doing what I usually do. Sit my wide ass on the couch, cuddle with Daisy [2]and Toby, and play video games. I know I know, I’m not supposed to like video games at my age. Pissh! Tosh! I do what makes brings me joy, naysayers notwithstanding.

I look forward to my years ahead, however many that might be. And as always, hope springs eternal…

 

References

References
1 Maybe now that I am on the council of elders, I’ll be able to get my memos more regularly.) )

To be honest, I don’t feel 50. Well, parts of me feel 50 but overall, I don’t feel it. My face might look it, but I don’t feel it. And 50 appears to be the new 40 in many of my circles so I guess I don’t have to go into seclusion just yet. Of course, today is also inauguration ((corrected – thanks Kevin!

2 and Toby

For Real

You know it is getting real over COVID-19 fears when Amazon Prime deliveries for same and next day delivery only show available 3 and 4 days later! lol

People are seriously freaking out. I always get a sick tickle over stuff like this because we think we are so civilized as a society. You throw in an unknown and people lose their minds. Don’t get me wrong, you should be concerned and take some precautions, like washing yo damn hands with soap and water often. Don’t run buy a bunch of masks that offer almost no protection.

My work is in hyper drive over it to say the least. The emergency response center is already activated even though we don’t yet have a single documented case in the city. But hey, better safe than sorry, right? *shrug*

I wish people put this much worry in preventing the spread of the flu every year. You know that virus that kills tens of thousands every year since 2010. People barely make an effort to get a vaccine readily available every year but OMG COVID is coming for us all!

Don’t even get me started on the conspiracy theories floating around already. Imma need a drink before I can even attempt to tackle that one. [1]A recent survey last week showed roughly 30% of people questioned thought there was a link to the Corona brand beer!

References

References
1 A recent survey last week showed roughly 30% of people questioned thought there was a link to the Corona brand beer!

Chewer

So Daisy is a chewer. When she gets a little worked up, she will chew on practically anything that happens to cross in her path. This by itself wouldn’t be so bad if she didn’t actually eat half the shit she chews on.

So far she has destroyed (and eaten part of) a combat boot, a cabinet leg, several shoes, a luggage strap, a couch throw pillow, a Velcro wrapping strap, and who knows what else. The unfortunate downside of said adventures is when she tries to poop all this mess out. Twice now she’s had ‘issues’ with pooping. Lawd, give me ‘strungth’. heehee [1]Thankfully, we invested it pet insurance for her.

Cooper was never much of a chewer and when he did, he knew what to chew on. He just got it right away. Daisy is a bit less focused so far. She’s still young so I’m sure she’ll grow out of it to a degree. However, most dogs that love to chew, do so well into old age. I hope the apt survives! haha She is just an angel otherwise; so sweet, gentle and just loves cuddles and rubs.

She has adjusted to living with us and is fully bonded. She feels safe when we aren’t there and rarely barks. She roams the block and neighborhood with me like a pro. She has developed a habit of sleeping next to me on the couch. She will drape one leg over mine and lay down to sleep. If she is next to me, her leg is over mine, no exceptions. It is totes adorable. She loves my roommate’s Frenchie, Toby. They get along too well at times. They love to play tug of war with toys and constantly like to play and wrestle. The noise can be a bit much when they get really worked up.

Beyond the chewing, she is very skittish. Bullies can be skittish, especially as pups. However, they tend to grow out of it. I’m not so sure Daisy will. She gets freaked out by strange sounds very easily. Even plastic grocery bags freaked her out at first. (Ironically, Fleet Week didn’t phase her one bit!) Anything close to her that makes a strange sound will set her off. My neighbor put out a skeleton dog as a Halloween decoration and she would not walk past it for a good 5 minutes. She finally figured out it wasn’t alive or going to hurt her. Even though, she still routinely sniffs it to make sure it’s not a threat. lol Some of that will change as she ages but I foresee her being skittish for years to come.

But, all problems aside I love her dearly. She is a sweet girl and just can’t help but love her. She has become part of the family.

References

References
1 Thankfully, we invested it pet insurance for her.

Sharing is Caring

A friend of a friend of a friend (you get the point here) recently sent me a DM on Facebook asking why I never share any of his posts he tags me in.

Me: Because I do not like sharing all that stuff. I do not enjoy it. Iā€™d prefer you not tag me on them.

Him: But what happens when it is something serious?

Me: Something serious as in? Microsoft and Yahoo are merging and if you forward this to to 10 people youā€™ll get a lot of money? Or, ā€œpeopleā€ are cloning your entire profile? Or, [insert generic meme about your porn name vs your spirit animal]? Or, discover these 10 things that will kill you, click here? [1]He has sent me every single one of these examples I do not care for these things. I definitely do not want them cluttering up my profile.

I do not care for these things. I definitely do not want them cluttering up my profile.

Him: You seem rude. Maybe you are not a nice person? Did you ever think of that?

Me: Yes, but I didnā€™t share it as a meme or spam everyone on my friends list.

He blocked me. Go figure.

References

References
1 He has sent me every single one of these examples

Sharing is Caring

A friend of a friend of a friend (you get the point here) recently sent me a DM on Facebook asking why I never share any of his posts he tags me in.

Me: Because I do not like sharing all that stuff. I do not enjoy it. Iā€™d prefer you not tag me on them.

Him: But what happens when it is something serious?

Me: Something serious as in? Microsoft and Yahoo are merging and if you forward this to to 10 people youā€™ll get a lot of money? Or, ā€œpeopleā€ are cloning your entire profile? Or, [insert generic meme about your porn name vs your spirit animal]? Or, discover these 10 things that will kill you, click here? [1]He has sent me every single one of these examples I do not care for these things. I definitely do not want them cluttering up my profile.

I do not care for these things. I definitely do not want them cluttering up my profile.

Him: You seem rude. Maybe you are not a nice person? Did you ever think of that?

Me: Yes, but I didnā€™t share it as a meme or spam everyone on my friends list.

He blocked me. Go figure.

References

References
1 He has sent me every single one of these examples

KindnessĀ 

I had to stop and share this. 

I’m checking in today at SFO on my way to Austin. I’m flying Virgin America and after a rather long security screening I arrive at the flight gate desk to see a very irate man practically yelling at the lady working the desk. He is basically blaming her for his delays in security and demanding all kinds of comps. 
He is just livid and the lady is on the edge of calling security. You can see the moment in her eyes when she goes from trying to console him to being fed up with his nonsense. The guy suddenly turns to me and trys to loop me into his drama-fest as I guess he saw me in the TSA line earlier. Now keep in mind, the flight is on time and we still have another 40 minutes before boarding starts. 

Being already fed up with his BS, I shake my head and in my best southern manners reply, “oh naw, don’t drag me into this, you’re doing a good job of making an ass of yourself without my help.” I then proceed to walk away until his fit is over or he gets hauled away. The latter I was prepared to film. The guy realizes he isn’t getting anywhere and walks away in a huff. 

The very frazzled lady motions me over with a huge smile and twinkle in her eye. She thanks me profusely for being so “patient.” [1]You can read between the lines here, she was gleeful seeing him get served some shade of his own making. She the asks if I needed anything since I had been standing in line. I inquired if there were any aisle seats. It was a full flight but she worked her magic and I was given a much appreciated aisle seat. She again thanked me profusely and I walked away to get food. 

Oh, the story isn’t over. 

I go scarf down some food and am headed back to the gate area when I see the same fellow storming away screaming into his cell phone. He has now been kicked off the flight for his behavior. Oh and he was furious that they had the nerve to put him in a middle seat! 

Now I do not know if my new seat assignment had anything to do with his predicament. There was no indication I was given his seat. It could have been, and most likely was, a random synchronous occurrence. However, I did notice a still present twinkle in the gate agent’s eye as I presented my brand new shiny aisle seat boarding pass for boarding. 

References

References
1 You can read between the lines here, she was gleeful seeing him get served some shade of his own making.