Category: news

Work

After 22 years I’m looking for a new job. No, I haven’t been fired but I’m reaching a crisis point with my department and I’m trying to get out before I get bitter. (Is this what they call a midlife crisis?)

I love what I do but the dept’s failure to keep staffing at even minimum levels is affecting my mental and physical health. I’m not a young man anymore and the almost weekly mandatory overtime for years is taken its toll. Short of a death in my family, time off beyond sick leave is never available. We are forced to sign up for all of our allotted vacation for the entire year in 1 sign up. And while the latter has always been the case, the new never-ending overtime has made it that much worse. If an event I’m planning to attend changes or gets cancelled, I’m screwed. I have to take the allotted slot or give it up completely. And while I could survive these things alone, the are not the only issue. Before COVID my dept had a massive turnover in staff. Two-thirds of our current staff has less than 10 years experience. On my watch, the closest person to me in seniority is 15 years my junior. This translates thru the chain of command as well. I feel very isolated most days at work. And while I could promote internally, that pathway isn’t really a solution. [1]Caveat, I will attempt to promote internally when it comes up again, just to improve my chances of moving to other jobs outside my division, but I’m hoping not to wait that long.

People routinely dismiss my classification as a minimal skillset but that is far from the truth, not to mention I had skills before I took this job. I’ve had opportunities throughout my career with the dept; leadership roles as well as extensive high level projects. The latter always serve to remind me of the skills I’m not using. That isn’t meant to sound demeaning as much as a clarification. I’m still very fortunate as I have a steady job and am not desperate or forced to take a job for the sake of work. That being said, I’m open to a variety of new opportunities. I’d ultimately like to stay in emergent services but that isn’t set in stone. My focus recently has been on other divisions within my overall dept but I’m starting to branch out.

My biggest hurdle is salary. While I’m definitely underpaid for the amount of work I currently perform, I make a decent salary. Finding a position that doesn’t require a degree that pays the same or more than I make now is challenging. [2]One should be so lucky. I recognize the privilege but that doesn’t change the need. I’m too old to start over from the bottom. This just means it may take me awhile. I’m forever optimistic and definitely believe I’m up for the challenge. I’m great at selling myself given the opportunity, as I’m confident in my skills and capabilities. I’ll be blunt, I could sell you a bridge in a desert.

Civil service moves like molasses, but I’d like to stay within to keep contributing to my pension. It would take a really lucrative offer to pull me away from a city job. I’m not so naive to think jobs are falling from the sky but not totally opposed to jumping back into the private sector.

I’ve had these feelings for awhile but as I sit here putting it to text it suddenly feels more real to me, like it’s “out there” now. For a long time I just assumed I’d retire here but that is increasingly untenable. *Whew*. I’ve put myself on this path and hope to find a viable solution as soon as I can. Worst case scenario, I have to promote from within then jump to other divisions or depts.

At the end of the day, I know myself and I don’t want to end up becoming so jaded and bitter my inaction or indifference causes harm to someone.

References

References
↑1 Caveat, I will attempt to promote internally when it comes up again, just to improve my chances of moving to other jobs outside my division, but I’m hoping not to wait that long.
↑2 One should be so lucky. I recognize the privilege but that doesn’t change the need.

Contrary

If you ever call 911 in San Francisco, there is a chance you’ll hear my lovely voice. I’ve done a few PSA’s over the years here and with that in mind, let me offer a few tips for calling the police or 911 to save us both a lot of time and angst.

1. Cooperate. We are here to help you. The questions asked are necessary and often mandated. No, we can’t take your word for it. Yes, we can multitask. Oftentimes on critical incidents, emergency services are already on the way while we are still speaking. The more you fight the process the longer it will take.

2. Be specific. People often use subjective phrases that have to be clarified. A good one is “I was robbed”. How were you robbed? At gunpoint, grab and dash, vandalized car or locker, or an item is missing? We have to clarify what the problem is prior to dispatch. This is purely an educational issue I feel cities are failing to provide to it’s citizens.

3. Be realistic. Demanding an immediate response for infractions or even minor crimes is not going to get it. Agencies prioritize responses based on policies and rules, some of which are also legal mandates. There has to be a prioritization system because if everything is an emergency, nothing is an emergency. And here is the bad news…response rules aren’t based on your level of frustration with a given problem. I know that last one is a hard pill to swallow.

Following these simple instructions will get you services as promptly as possible; based on the needs of the emergency services system and your compliance. [1]Sorry, Facebook being down or the drive thru at McDonald’s being closed early is NOT an emergency or even a police issue.  If you do have issues with the system, it cannot be addressed while you are on an emergency line. You can always contact a supervisor for dispatch or police, and/or contact your local government body.

What NOT TO DO:

Call 911 just because you don’t know the “other number.” This is a big one. If it’s not an emergency, look up the proper number. Hell, you can ask Siri or Google, they will tell you and offer to dial. In SF, you can also call 311, they can connect you with non emergency services. When you multiply these callers by 10 at any given moment, it clogs up 911 lines very quickly and literally prevents real emergent calls from getting answered timely. This is not an exaggeration. I’ve lost count of all the true emergency calls delayed in queue because the lines were tied up with lazy callers and accidental dials. Who knows how many deaths.

Be contrary. Agencies have protocols to triage all calls for police, fire, or medical. Deciding you will demand or don’t need to answer “a bunch of unnecessary questions” is likely to delay the help you need and potentially delay how fast it arrives on scene. You cannot override the system simply because you deem it necessary. Being nasty because you can’t get your way only makes you more frustrated in the end.

Take Offense. Our clipped and short questions are not a sign of disinterest or attitude. We process thousands of calls per day and we tend to focus on what we need for responding units and getting off the phone to answer the next emergency in queue. We don’t always have the luxury of validating the crime or your angst. It is not personal, so please don’t assume otherwise. We are also incredibly short-staffed.

*

We are used to getting demanding callers, it is the nature of the beast. Let’s face it, no one calls 911 because they are happy. We often encounter people at one of the worst moments in their lives. [2]Frankly, the latter are rarely the problem. We completely understand that. However, I’ve noticed a trend lately where more & more callers in the non-emergent setting feel compelled to be contrary or make completely unrealistic demands.

Summary: You don’t have to be your best self, but being difficult for the sake of difficulty doesn’t get you what you want.

References

References
↑1 Sorry, Facebook being down or the drive thru at McDonald’s being closed early is NOT an emergency or even a police issue.
↑2 Frankly, the latter are rarely the problem.

Twit

Thoughts on 3lon buying the blue bird?

For myself, I barely use Twitter anymore so I’m not trying to necessarily pick a side here. I am deeply concerned about how this will unravel though. He has plans to fundamentally alter Twitter IMO. Like it or not, Twitter has become a household name. It is a mass communication tool with global reach.

I’ve already seen folks within the #alphabetmafia applauding his purchase. I wonder if they’ve thought this through. Twitter will now be privately owned, which means he can do whatever he wants with it (within some limits). He can dis(allow) any content he deems (un)worthy. He could try to monitize it thru more than just ads. What happens if he does and decides porn is no longer allowed? Can you say “Tumblr?” You may not care if porn gets the axe, but LGBT+ issues are routinely flagged as “adult material” online.

He may be the new sole owner but he leveraged that purchase and he will want a return on his investment. Keep in mind, this all started because he was censored for spreading conspiracies. Who will keep that in check now? I mean Twitter wasn’t doing a bang up job before, but there was some effort to keep it honest.

I have no idea how this will play out. I don’t have any immediate plans to delete my accounts. I also wish I could say I don’t care, but I do. The ramifications of this are breathtaking.

A single man just bought a social media company with over 300 million users. What does that kind of wealth say about our society? What does it say about our future?

Perky

Ever have one of those days where for no apparent reason you have an extra pep in your step? You feel extra just for being awake? Or, you just feel awesome for no real reason? I had one recently and I was tickled pink when I realized it. I guess it has been so long I had almost forgotten what it felt like. At face value that sounds kind of sad, but considering the state of the world these last couple years anyone could be forgiven.

I tend to be a rather upbeat person. It is just my nature. As I push 51, it is also a mark of pride I still have such days. My job has certainly had an impact on a subconscious level. Being on an assignment for the past 5 years definitely helped. In general, I believe life’s responsibilities and worries tend to wear us down and take the “shine” off our world view. That said, I definitely missed the feeling and hope I’ve found enough of my old optimism to have more of them. The irony here is in some of the roughest times of my life I was the most optimistic. Nothing really seemed to tarnish my boundless good moods back then. One could say I’m a bit more jaded now.

I can’t help but wonder if my recent attempts to limit my social media exposure has anything to do with it. I spend less than 15 mins a day on FB or Twitter. About 90% of my IG feed is thirst traps and gym motivation. My brain gets its fill of context switching from TikTok, where I’ve curated a feed of comedy and funny home videos. [1]Context Switching can be highly addicting and destructive to your work day or motivation I’ve also started denying myself the urge to check media/news apps first thing in the morning. I deliberately avoid them for at least 30 mins to an hour to give myself time to wake up and just be present. I pick up my phone and briefly scroll the notification panel for anything truly urgent and then just avoid it for a while.

I’m fond of saying “hope springs eternal” here and it has been a struggle these last 4-5 years to follow that mantra. Not to go all doom and gloom but I’m seriously worried for our way of life. Greed, bias and anti-intellectualism has replaced integrity, truth, and science. But, at the end of the day, I can only control myself. I cannot control others. My innate desire to “correct someone on the internet who is wrong” is slowly being replaced by a “leave it alone“. Successful discourse online is all but dead. I firmly believe my avoidance of that toxic environment is having an effect on me. I’m eager to test the theory.

So….hope springs eternal… (you knew it was coming.)

References

References
↑1 Context Switching can be highly addicting and destructive to your work day or motivation

Gloomy News

If you’ve been living under a rock, it came out this week Facebook has been lying to us all along. A whistleblower came forward and spilled a bunch of dirt on the down right shitty behavior of FB, not that any of us should be surprised. Social media has become a poison in our lives IMO. It does far more harm than good. I get that social media is what we make it, but that argument only holds up in an unbiased scenario. FB has demonstrated they are manipulating us.

I’ve been weening myself off FB to the point I spend less than 15 mins online on any given day. Mostly, I peruse a few comments/profiles or share the occasional news article. There are days I get caught up in the “someone on the internet is wrong” mentality, but those are rare now. Frankly, it’s not worth it. I plan to eventually phase out sharing any news content at all as well. I turned off notifications for FB sometime ago and it has panned out to be an excellent decision.

Then we find out last week AT&T was the primary sponsor for the propaganda site OAN. [1] I wont’ link to them. The world is so used to scandal now, everyone just seemed to give a collective sigh and move on. I guess that was probably the goal. I already don’t use their products so can’t cancel my service….I highly recommend you do. OAN is the far right cousin to Fox News, with little to no pretense at propaganda. In a word, its vile.

I know I sound all doom and gloom, but the news as of late has me in a bit of a gloomy mood. I’ve been saying for awhile, we are headed for a calamity. Honestly, I think it’s coming soon. Scary stuff for sure but all I can control is me. I can control the content I read, use, and share. I can control my actions. I can control to whom I give my time and energy. If it wasn’t for my never ending sense of optimism, I think I’d need medication. I can see how folks get caught up in it and just go off the deep end.

These days my online presence is usually IG [2]Yes, I know FB owns it for gym inspiration and “the TikTok” [3]I love seeing folks go apocalyptic when I use “the” with the name for humor. I’d love to abandon social media all together, but I’m not there yet. I’d give in and be back. I figured this way, I’ll eventually just ween myself off. Hey, one can hope right? hehehe

References

References
↑1 I wont’ link to them.
↑2 Yes, I know FB owns it
↑3 I love seeing folks go apocalyptic when I use “the” with the name

Mask-less

I ran a small experiment on FB the other day to prove an idea. I asked, “Why did you trust the CDC recommendation to wear a mask but don’t trust them now saying it’s ok not to wear one?” [1]If you came here from the FB post, thanks for your response. And it worked in favor of the discussion that the CDC under trump was constantly being meddled with but is now being run based on the science with no interference from the Biden HHS appointee.

The answers were varied but pretty much what I expected. A common thread was many would continue “out of an abundance of caution.” And to be clear, I’m not trying to shame anyone or even be judgmental. My thoughts couldn’t be further from that. You should do what makes you feel safe. It did validate my theory though. Human beings have a hard time updating their moral/ethical standards. They do not adapt well to standards that changes too quickly. It cuts to the core of how we process our reality. When the idea of right and wrong changes too quickly many people develop of sense of disbelief. This disbelief can lead to fear, anger, shock, judgment, and/or even a larger disconnect from the world around them. When you add in a lack of knowledge (willful or otherwise), religion, or other biases it only serves to increase the disconnect.

Just as one example, look how many gay men fought the idea of PrEP. [2]Pre-Exposure Prophylactic PrEP has been around for years now and has consistently and repeatedly proven to be a better preventative measure to the spread of HIV than condoms. However, there are still contingents within the community who know better. The latter is often based more on biases and personal judgment than science, but that isn’t the point today. The triggers are deeper than than. After 3 decades of having the idea that “safe sex is sex with a condom” pounded into our heads, many men (and women) simply can’t process the idea of it suddenly not being applicable anymore. I see it more in older gay men, many of which witnessed the agony and suffering caused by AIDS and it’s devastation on our community. To wake up one day and be told, “condoms are fine but bareback is now perfectly fine IF you use this drug” simply does not compute. In our brains, we “know” what works. We understand the simple idea of placing a barrier between ourselves and others as a form of protection. The idea of removing that physical barrier we can see in favor of a drug treatment barrier [3]that many often do not understand completely just “seems wrong” to many.

Another common answer was people “couldn’t trust others to be honest about their vaccination status.” That is an admirable approach; however, why is it your responsibility to protect those who are willfully ignorant or refuse to get vaccinated, especially since we don’t do this for other vaccinations? Why is this one suddenly different? Is it really caution or the disbelief in a suddenly changing moral standard? Hmmm? And looking at the risk, it is no longer an equal equation. We collectively make a social contract to protect each other by each person respectively doing their part. When it was equal you saw me constantly encouraging folks to wear their masks and social distance. I’m all about harm reduction. As a vaccinated person I’m not really keeping anyone else safer now by wearing my mask. [4]Yes, there are exceptions but those are in the small minority.  As an unvaccinated person, you should continue to wear your mask and avoid overly crowded places. However, if you refuse to get vaccinated, it is no longer an equal equation and you are shifting the burden onto others. The social contract is broken.

If you are still worried for yourself due to other health issues that is certainly ok. Again, at no point is this discussion meant to dissuade anyone from doing what they feel is right for themselves.

Vaccinations are readily available almost everywhere in the US now and availability is increasing every day. Vaccinations are free and you can now get a free Uber/Lyft ride to your local vaccination sites. You have no excuse not to get vaccinated. We have so many doses of the vaccines now we are sending them to other countries still in dire need.

The last popular argument was a lack of trust in the CDC over pressure to reopen. I do think the CDC feels some pressure to ‘open up’ society, but not at the expense of a rising death toll. They know some will still become infected and potentially even die. However, our safe guards are about harm reduction. From a medical viewpoint, we will have to COVID in our lives for years to come. The degree of danger from it is lower every day now. We have reached an important threshold, even at just 50% immunity. Our emergency response systems, including hospitals, are unlikely to be overwhelmed by new patients. It is likely we will eventually reach over 60% of the country being vaccinated, 70% if we are lucky. And while still below the “herd immunity” threshold, that just means, as alluded above,  we will end up with yearly booster shots, much like the flu virus. It could be with us indefinitely due to variants or just a few years until we reach a real herd immunity. Eventually, those not vaccinated are likely to contract it. They could also suffer reinfection from variants, but again much like the flu, they are less likely to be hospitalized or die after surviving a first infection.

There are always other health variables for an individual to consider, so you should do what makes you feel safe. For myself, I trust the science and am comfortable with my decision to go mask-less where it is allowed. I think many of us aren’t really worried as much as we are conflicted on an evolving standard.

References

References
↑1 If you came here from the FB post, thanks for your response.
↑2 Pre-Exposure Prophylactic
↑3 that many often do not understand completely
↑4 Yes, there are exceptions but those are in the small minority.

Post Pandemic Travel

I took a trip last weekend for the first time since the pandemic hit. It was our firstbesties trip since January 2020 when we went on the cruise. Of course, I had to go see my bestie. It was supposed to both besties but Mikey had to work and couldn’t come down from Dallas. (We were in Houston)

At least Trev and I got to spend quality time together and reconnect our friendship. Overall, it was a great trip. Prior to the pandemic, we had two trips planned to spend time together but that all went to sh*t obviously. It’s been roughly 2 years since we’ve all seen each other. I’m headed back in July for Trev’s birthday and Mikey will be there then.

Our friendship has spanned a lifetime and I am grateful it has survived so long. We didn’t do anything crazy, just dinners, socializing, and a small pool party on Sunday. [1]Everyone in attendance was vaccinated.  I was pleasantly surprised how many places still required masks. Pretty much every restaurant or business we visited required masks to be worn for entry. No one was being an ass or making a fuss about it. It was an affirmation that while Texas politics might be crazy, many of the folks who live there are still very sane. Well, except the bars. We went out Saturday night and it was like there was no pandemic once you got indoors at the bar. Barely a mask insight. Even half the staff weren’t wearing them.

To be fair, Houston has been pushing vaccines hard. Plenty of billboards were advertising for free vaccines and where to go. New cases are stable so while part of me was a bit shocked, it was my hope many of these folks were vaccinated. SF is now 70% for their 1st shot and 45% fully vaccinated. A few people I spoke to indicated they had had their shots so the overall experience was net positive in my mind. [2]Both Trevan and I have had our shots and with the current CDC guidelines we didn’t feel like we posed a risk to anyone.  At this point, I’m pretty much over the ignorant folks.

Since originally it was supposed to be three of us, I didn’t feel the need to torture Shawn by making him go with me. (The two besties and I together is more than poor Shawn can handle.) He ended up traveling to Phoenix the same weekend. Ironically, he encountered a similar experience at an outdoor bar there as well.

The trip home was uneventful, but I was absolutely giddy when I got home. It felt so good to get away and do just normal things. Socializing and seeing friends and just being out in the world felt so good. I definitely came back feeling like we are really coming out of this now.

Sadly, it is looking like we won’t reach heard immunity because of all the idiots refusing to get vaccinated. We are still ahead of the curve at least. The current crop of vaccines are effective against all the variants out there so far. There are a few variants now that could potentially allow a person to become contagious or sick, but they would not get sick enough to die or even require hospitalization. And with speed the vaccines can be modified to incorporate immunity to new variants, I’m resigned to just getting a covid shot every year with the flu shot.

It was a great trip and I feel rejuvenated in many ways. I’m so excited to get back out into the world this year. Every day, we get news of more and more events being allowed due to dropping case numbers. SF is expected to reach herd immunity by the end of May. We could end up having no restrictions ahead of even the rest of California if this trend continues.

Hope springs eternal…

 

References

References
↑1 Everyone in attendance was vaccinated.
↑2 Both Trevan and I have had our shots and with the current CDC guidelines we didn’t feel like we posed a risk to anyone.

Optimisitic

First, thank you to the folks who reached out to me after my last post. I wasn’t down or depressed. I find talking about it quite therapeutic. It was on my mind so I put pen to paper, so to speak. But, yes I’m doing well.

I’ve found myself feeling optimistic again lately. It helps that we are back in the gym again…again. I feel like we’ve crossed a major hurdle now and we are over the worst of this pandemic. The supply is now on track and a 3rd vaccine just got an EUA. [1]Emergency Use Authorization It is my prediction we won’t see anymore severe lockdowns, at least here in California. Hopefully, my words bear out to be true.

Speaking of the gym, after the first severe lockdown and they sorted out a tier system, I had the roughest time getting back into a solid gym routine. Ironically, right when I found my stride they got shut down again. We’ve been back at it for a couple weeks now and this time it wasn’t as hard. It was a shorter break but I was surprised I didn’t need the extra weeks to build back endurance. The weight I’m slinging is still much lower, but it feels good to be back.

Fun fact, the government will not mandate the vaccine. Vaccines released under EUA aren’t eligible for mandatory vaccination orders. While I trust the sciences, EUAs are designed to allow for immediate use while study continues. However, that does not mean you won’t see restrictions on day to day activities from private companies. You may end up having to show proof to go back to in-person work, fly, or return as an adult to college, etc.

Locally, we are moving into the Red Tier this week. Red is still restrictive but a lot of businesses, including restaurants, get to re-open at limited capacity.  New cases have been below 100 per day for almost two weeks now and available ICU beds are way up. It seems people in general are more optimistic and looking towards the light at the end of the tunnel. Hopefully, as vaccinations rise, we will ease back to normal by year end. I’ve even seen some big events toward the end of the year start planning for in person gatherings.

For myself, I miss hugging. Such a small thing but I miss it. Sure, I miss traveling. I miss the ease of just “doing things”, but it’s the little things I miss the most. I miss the casual intimacy that comes from being close to people you know. I’m eagerly looking forward to it.

As always, hope springs eternal…

References

References
↑1 Emergency Use Authorization

January 6, 2021

Well, I think we can all agree yesterday was a total shit show! Armed conspiracy nuts descended en-masse on the capitol, after days & weeks of being fed propaganda & lies by our out-going president, congressional leaders, and propaganda media. This day will go down as a dark stain on American history.

We all witnessed it unfold for the world to see. These patriots traitors committed seditious acts and deserve to be prosecuted once the new administration takes office. Even worse, the active president refused to act allowing the situation to go on for hours before enough forces would be mobilized to quell the insurrection. [1]Several news outlets reported it was Pence who authorized the National Guard, even though that power rests squarely with the president. It is important to remember D.C. is not a state yet  And let us not forget the inept mismanagement of the capitol building grounds that allowed for this. The entire episode carried on long enough many people just wandered away vs being expelled. To say it was an embarrassing day for our country would be an understatement. If anything, it was the perfect example of our current president’s failures.

We did finally see order restored and the ceremonial act to certify votes was completed. It still had it’s own drama, as over 100 house republicans pushed their fake narratives during the process. At least the senate had enough common sense to drop all but one of their remaining fake grievances with the electoral college results. They all knew nothing could change the outcome of the election.

History will remember trump as the corrupt selfish childish man he is. It will not be kind to this traitorous fool. And now that he is about to lose his immunity from prosecution, history will also remember what comes next. We witnessed a man-child act out of fear and desperation to try to hold onto power. His scorched-Earth approach has failed spectacularly.

History will also remember these fools who fell for this dangerous propaganda. It will remember the seditious acts of a deluded group of fools. It will painstakingly paint their racism, ignorance, and bias into the history books. I take great comfort in knowing they will not be remembered as “patriots”. No, they will be remembered as a bunch of ignorant social media warriors who made it as far as they did only because of inept mismanagement of the capitol grounds.

I eagerly await President-elect Biden’s inauguration. [2]On my birthday no less!  He was not my candidate of choice; however, he is proving to be just what America needs right now. Hopefully, he will be able to restore many of the democratic safeguards dangerously eroded by trump and his cronies.

Hope springs eternal… [3]This post has been updated to correct my reference to the white house instead of the capitol building

References

References
↑1 Several news outlets reported it was Pence who authorized the National Guard, even though that power rests squarely with the president. It is important to remember D.C. is not a state yet
↑2 On my birthday no less!
↑3 This post has been updated to correct my reference to the white house instead of the capitol building

Recovery

Building on my last post, I wanted to share more about the small but welcome improvements in the SF area. California adopted the 4-tier system of restrictions relating to the pandemic. If your state doesn’t have it, it’s pretty simple. Each tier has it’s own level of restrictions, what can/can’t open, etc. We have purple, red, orange, & yellow; purple being the most severe and yellow being the least. It makes it easier for counties and cities to better manage local health orders and restrictions.

Of course, SF being a very dense environment, even when we move into a higher tier we tend to have some lingering tougher restrictions. While unfortunate, it is necessary to avoid a resurgence of cases. And seeing surges in pretty much the entire middle of the US, we are grateful for the slow but steady improvements. SF has officially moved into the orange tier and our ‘rt’ ratio is hovering just below 1. [1]rt is the likelihood of retransmission from an infected person. Anything above 1 is considered not good.  Hopefully, we can stay in the orange and yellow tiers.  *crossed fingers*

Indoor bars, theaters, and larger social establishments are still closed. (I don’t understand why theaters can’t open if gyms can, but I don’t make the rules.) Restaurants have been able to serve outdoor seating for awhile now. Some bars have paired up with restaurants to gain an allowance to open outdoors as well. Now that SF is in the orange tier, restaurants and retail shops can open indoor facilities in a limited capacity. For myself, I still avoid eating indoors. I am just not that confident in others. We tend to order for home more than going out to eat, but I try to adhere to my weekend rituals as much as I can.

Shawn and I have slowly been allowing ourselves to do more outside the apt. Meanwhile, I see people planning trips and going to far off places and I just shake my damn head. If this pandemic has taught me anything, it is that a lot of people don’t really give two-shits about others as long as they aren’t inconvenienced. But, I digress… I have restrictions that also affect my ability to work so even if I was more comfortable, I would still not be traveling.

I’ve been seeing and helping an elderly retired coworker since the beginning of the pandemic and every time I see him, I make sure to test negative for covid-19 beforehand. Before we could get tests, I would leave disinfected items outside his doorway or stairs. He is in a high risk category due to his age and I would never forgive myself if I inadvertently passed it on to him. [2]or anyone for that matter. Anyway, I’m getting upset thinking about it, let me move on.

Beyond the assistance to my dear friend above, we are just now reaching a point where we feel comfortable meeting people outdoors for meals or conversation. I say we, but it is more me. lol Shawn is still content to avoid people for the most part. He will probably be reticent until there is a viable vaccine. Even when to go to the gym, we usually go to a sparsely populated location with sign-ups well below the allowable limit. [3]You can see online how many slots are available and taken by the hour. It has been good for him to get out of the apt more though. He was getting really depressed as well. I think the gym and the sporadic trips outside of the apt has helped him as much as it has me.

Of course, we miss traveling. We miss weekend jaunts to bars, beer busts, movies, etc. We miss visiting distant friends and places. We miss a lot of things. It sucks monkey balls, but we know by isolating we are helping to prevent the spread of covid-19. We are both hopeful a safe vaccine will be available sometime early next year. For myself, I doubt I’ll ever take for granted again the openness of our life. The simple freedom to hug friends, to kiss or touch others, to be close to people. I think the intimacy of strangers (if such a thing exists) is what I miss the most. The relaxed restrictions gives me hope we are on the right path. Until then, I hope you are safe and well.

References

References
↑1 rt is the likelihood of retransmission from an infected person. Anything above 1 is considered not good.
↑2 or anyone for that matter.
↑3 You can see online how many slots are available and taken by the hour.