Forward

Thank you to everyone for kind words and support. I’m constantly overwhelmed by the amount of love received from complete strangers. (Even though, a huge chunk of you are no longer strangers.) I cannot express in words my gratitude. A special thank you to al from Bent Collective for his very insightful post. A post I will refer back to in a bit.

First, I’d like to answer a few questions about my friend.

No, I will not share his name out of respect for his ex’s wishes.
No, he was not my boyfriend, now or in the past. We were just good friends.
He will be cremated this week after the autopsy.
Yes, the family will claim the body. And I could care less what they do with it now. It’s an empty shell.
His brother has been kind enough to offer me part of his ashes (via his ex). I am hoping this comes to fruition as I would very much like that.

I am at peace knowing my friend knew the people who cared for him most were there when he needed us. My sorrow is still fresh but tempered by my love and belief he is still around. I meet the day w/a smile on my face remembering my friend in love.

In Passing…

It is with a heavy heart that I announce my friend died today. After almost a month in ICU battling HIV related pneumonia, he succombed to the illness. I’m sure his family can rest easy now knowing their “faggot” of a son is dead. And I hope whatever god they believe in visits the pain of their ignorance on theme twicefold in shame.

I am saddened but I am also happy. Happy that he is free of the pain and anguish. Happy, he’ll never know how his family tried to unplug him and take his belongings before having seen him in the hospital. His parents were family by chance, I was his family by choice. I think I got the better end of the deal. He was a beautiful person inside and out and he will be missed. More importantly, he will be remembered. I do not believe death is the end. Maybe, if I’m lucky, I’ll encounter his soul again someday.

And to anyone who thinks AIDS is just another disease, I am here to tell you how wrong you are. With all our knowledge and all our drugs, HIV is still killing us one by one. It doesn’t care what race, sex, creed or orientation we are. It kills indiscriminately. And as long as we continue to hide behind petty prejudices many more will die. It killed my friend out of ignorance. You see, he didn’t know he was poz. He’d never been tested out of fear and shame. He was taught all his life being gay was shameful and evil. He finally had the courage to come out and live his life openly only to die 6 years later.

I am often ashamed of humanity, today is one of those days.

Nice Moby

This past weekend everyone kept saying how nice I was like it was a surprise. I must admit I was a little taken aback by that. Of course, I’m a nice guy! *g* But, I guess I sorta take that for granted. It’s pretty easy to miss if you aren’t looking for it in my writings.

Work has been a terror this week. WAY too much going on. Our contract negotiations are in full swing and the city is playing hard ball. The union is using my dept as the focus of it’s campaign. Mainly, as we are the extreme compared to other depts. in the city. No word yet on what affect our efforts have had on the process. Only time will tell at this point. We have one more big rally coming up next week. If the turnout is good, it will definitely help.

My friend in the hospital is still not doing well. On top of that, the family has shown up and causing more harm than good. Thankfully, he is still intubated so he is unaware of all this. I’m beginning to lose hope he will recover. Every step forward is met w/two steps back. It has been weighing on my mind a lot this week.

I finally got back into the gym today. I’ve only been once in the last two weeks and it’s been driving me nuts. It felt good but I only got half a work out in. Back and biceps. Tomorrow is quads and calves. I’m still working on the work out tips post and am hoping to have it up over the weekend.

I’ve been so distracted this week, I totally forgot last night was the final contest for the BCC contest. Ooops! I don’t even know who the winners are. How sad is that? Ugh. I’m glad the hard part is over. Now my work drops off quite a bit till June. Hey, I’ll take my breaks anywhere I can get’em.

Duty calls…happy weekend all.

Oooops!

Everyone was taking so many pics over the past weekend, I forgot that I actually snapped off a few. I guess I’m the only one who got the group shot. I remembered after hearing brettcajuns podcast this morning.

Left to right brettcajun, Kel, Dan turning 40, woof brandon, Tony, homer, Steve, Jeff, Sean, & Glenn

Not to be left out, I had to get one w/me in it. hehehe
Moby, Chad Fox, brettcajun, Woof Brandon, Tony, & homer.

Moving On

The apartment feels so empty this morning w/out homer and brettcajun rambling around. Brett was usually sittin’ at the computer updating his blog while homer would be either watching TV or watching Brett. The guys were so muh fun to have around. I hope they come back soon.

The one thing the really struck me about our meeting was the interaction. The three of us was very relaxed and unforced around each other. You don’t find that much in complete strangers. It’s probably the number one reason I took to both of them instantly.

Oh, I loaded some more pics. I still have a few left to load but check’em out.

Finito

So the blogger weekend is over. brettcajun and homer are probably already home as I write this. Chad Fox was kind enough to overload us w/pics. We got some quality goof time in as well. I’m uploading them to pics.mobius.name. It’s active now but only a few pics loaded so far. Check back later for the 30-40 pics I’m keeping. *click on the top right icon to enlarge it so you can really see the pics.*

What can I say about the weekend? Was it worth it? Did I measure up? Did they? You probably know the answers already but I’ll bang it out anyway. The boys already know how I feel about them so I’ll share qualities in each that stood out.

My impressions of brettcajun? Charming and sweet come right to the front. I wasn’t too worried about Brett. I thought we’d hit it off. I did discover he has a naivete which makes him absolutely adorable. And while he tries to act out on his blog, I think he is really a bit shy. This trip was good for him, IMHO. He got a chance to come out of his shell. No judgements or fear of rejection, just a chance to connect w/other gay guys. I hope the honest feedback he got from everyone stays w/him as he returns to the normalcy of home.

And homer? Actually, I was a little worried homer and I wouldn’t connect much. Worried he might find me over the top. I’m glad my assumptions were off the mark. homer is very witty. The classic smart ass mixed in with a wholesome sensability. You don’t quite get that from his blog. He is also very gracious and kind. Traits I always find admirable. (Even though he didn’t fix my toilet as promised. )

Tony (the lurker one. *g*) Tony doesn’t have a blog but has been a regular commentor for months now. And while we all had fun w/him, I don’t really feel I am any more connected to him than I was before. He is very nice in person however, he didn’t really open up much. I’m not sure if that was because I was a bad host or if he is just reserved. I definitely have an extroverted personality. I think Brett and homer fed off of that. I’m left to wonder if that had the opposite affect on Tony. He hung out with us all weekend but I never really heard much from him. I’m hoping all the bloggers he met will spur him into doing his own blog so we can all get to know him better. *I’m not very good at being subtle. You think he’ll get the hint?*

homer and Brett were great houseguests. I think we were all a little nervous but that melted away. In it’s place, friendships were forged. Not only considerate but they were well-behaved and I had no worries about leaving them unattended. They are both welcome back anytime.

The rest is an accounting of our ramblings to help explain some of the pics. Feel free to read or skip. I know you’re just here for the ‘purdy’ pictures.
Continue reading Finito

Blog Me Baby II!

Well, it looks like I got my wish to meet a lot of my blogroll bud’s. The blogger meeting tomorrow is growing! I ran into Chad Fox today in the Castro before work and he signed on. He is gonna drag Kel and Daigle with him. Sexy Vic from v-hold has shown some interest. Even woof brandon might show up! And this is all before the graduation party for roblog tomorrow night.

homer and brettcajun are just as much fun in person as they are in the blogosphere. They joined me for my stint at the BCC contest last night. I lucked out and got to leave early so the rest of the time we spent watching tivo and chatting. Today, homer is off to Berkeley to explore some archeological stuff and Brett is slumming the day away w/lurker Tony. I’m working of course. (Pat me on the back for being such a dedicated civil servant!)

My only wish is that Steve from Bent Collective could have been in attendance. I can report he is mending quite nicely. I only wish I had better news about my local friend’s condition. He is still very sick and I’m worried about him.

Duty calls, so more later….Lots of pics coming!

First Contact..Sort Of

So here is the pic of Tony, brettcajun, and homer at the moby pad. How did I find out? I had to log onto brett’s blog to find this pic. Here I am slaving away at work and they can’t even CALL me to let me know the plane hasn’t crashed into the ocean. I mean god forbid they let their gracious host know they made it safely. Especially, after Brett had a horrible Ms. Cleo moment a few months back about his SF trip. Gosh!

hehehe, I’m joking of course. I’m at work and delighted to see the boys made it safe and sound. I’m counting the minutes till I can get away and go see them in person.