If you use any social media these days, I’m sure you’ve seen the cringe content. [1]Content that is blatantly made to show off a person’s anatomy, usually to advertise their fans or similar accounts  Or maybe I’m just a whore and the one seeing it a lot. hehehe Continuing on the vein that me being a whore is not the problem, it has really picked up a lot lately. Don’t even get me started on the “influencers.”

Most days, I just block the worst ones and keep going. On one hand, I feel like it’s just one more step in the demoralization of society thru social media and the “me” mentality. On the other hand, I’m glad to see more people are less judgmental about sex work. I see zero problems with a person using what they got to make a living. You use your mind to get jobs, why is using your body any different? As long as you are a consenting adult not being coerced, go for it.

That said, that’s not my purpose for being on social media. I’m always saddened when an account I already follow starts their own fan site. Inevitably, their social accounts all turn into ad-engines for their “content”. It’s usually an unfollow from me. I might be shallow, but I need something other than a boner to keep me following someone.  (Don’t say it, Steve.)

The hubby will just roll his eyes sometimes when I’m scrolling thru YouTube shorts on the TV. It’s 50% weird/funny and 50% hot guys. Some of the content is a little cringy and some of it is just awful. lolol  Luckily, I don’t get my self-esteem thru comparing myself to these guys so it’s not a negative…for me. I can understand for some it could end up being harmful. That is definitely a nut we can crack another day. I’m ranting about my shallowness right now after all. And in that vein of thought, [2]see what I did there? Lol  some of the more aggressive advertisements have taken to using toys to show off what they “have”, so to speak. I’m like, do you think we can’t tell? Or do people just not care? Do people pay for hot guys waving around a fake appendage as if it’s real? Inquiring minds need to know! A quick Google search shows many of them turn out to have the goods (allegedly ), but I guess they need it to appear more visible than it otherwise would without full exposure.

And knowing what some of them make, I wonder if I chose the wrong career path sometimes. I’m too old for that life but it’s a shame it took so long for “fan” sites to not only be accepted but popular. I could have made a bank. 😜 And none of that coy teasing nonsense either.

I wish you could see me laughing as I type this stuff. The blog was always focused on my self-discovery and growth for so many years, I don’t think my silly side came across as part of my personality often enough.

Now you know. 🙂




1 Content that is blatantly made to show off a person’s anatomy, usually to advertise their fans or similar accounts
2 see what I did there? Lol

GHHD #1 2024

Well, it’s almost Gay High Holy Day #1 (Pride weekend). While I’ve often admitted to feeling disconnected from Pride celebrations these days, I think more than ever we need visibility. We need to show we are not going away. Trying to legislate us out of existence is never going to work. The alphabet mafia, in all its splendor, is here to stay.

I encourage you to celebrate Pride in whatever manner you feel benefits your life. There isn’t a wrong or right way. You don’t need to feel part of the scene [1]ugh, don’t even get me started on the thousands of definitions associated with “the scene” to celebrate. You can do it with family, friends, even hookups, etc. Or don’t, it really is up to you.

Just take a moment to be grateful for those that paved the way. Call it a blessing, a remembrance, a prayer; just try to understand it hasn’t been an easy fight and many of our brothers and sisters died in our fight for equality. Regardless of your beliefs, that deserves respect.

For myself, I volunteered at a work booth this year. I’ll be doing outreach and recruiting to get more of us into my field of work. If you’re a local and plan to be out and about, stop by the SFFD (Fire) booth and say hi on Sunday. My dept has never had its own booth and luckily we were invited to join this year, so it will be a first for me!



1 ugh, don’t even get me started on the thousands of definitions associated with “the scene”

Subscribers Update

If you are seeing this in your email box, at some point in the past you signed up for my blog updates.

I turned off my subscriber options for awhile while working to get the blog back in order. Since I’ve turned it back on you might see some posts you weren’t notified existed. As I continue to clean out the cobwebs, I’m also noticing some of the old registered accounts are constantly getting hammered by bots. I may have to eventually purge them. Just a heads up for the few followers I have left. I will post a notice prior to deletions so the 1 or 2 of you who still subscribe can resubscribe if you wish.

This should not affect anyone using an RSS reader.



Social Fail

As I’ve drifted away from Facebook and twitter, I’ve tended to use IG and TikTok a lot more. FB has become such a chore I mostly post updates and comment on folks I follow. The overwhelming ads and “suggestions” is just not worth my time to scroll thru. IG is fast becoming an ad-engine as well. Tiktok is an awesome time-waster when I have down time. It’s sort of a way to disconnect and let my brain become numb.  Beyond that, social media in general isn’t really worth the effort most days. I setup a Bluesky account but I barely use it as well. If I have to force myself, what’s the point?

The good news is I find myself wanting to get back to my blog more. How’s that for irony?

Who Dis?

I don’t get a lot of sp*m, courtesy of my Pixel Phone. Google does a pretty good job filtering out most of those calls. Lately, I’ve noticed an uptick in sp*m texts. And while a lot of them get filtered out, some make it thru. The new scam is to basically act like they have the wrong number and then they spend time luring you into a scam. It can take days or even weeks.

When I notice more than a few coming in, I’ve started texting a couple at a time, telling them my phone is dying, and to text my other phone. As you might surmise, I then give them the other scammers phone number. I get tickled wondering how long they go at it before realizing what’s happened. Lol I of course mark them as junk and block.

One day I was feeling particularly contentious and launched into a scenario with the person but immediately made up an emergency and asked them for money. I kept at it until the person told me to F**k O**. Hehehe. It took him almost 30 minutes to figure it out. I kept texting for hours too asking for money over and over.

On a side tangent, I’m still shocked how many people fall for these scams. I get calls weekly at work from folks who sent thousands of dollars only to realize too late they are being scammed.

And if you’ve been lucky enough to not get these, it simple. The unknown person texts as if they are texting a person they know, and unless you’re having fun like me, ignore it. It’s highly likely to be a scam. Also, no legitimate agency or business takes payment for services in gift cards. The police or feds do not offer to take monetary settlements for warrants or charges over the phone. The US Treasury does not send local police to arrest you for back taxes. And when it’s the [insert relative name] is in jail scam, again the police will not call you to prevent their arrest by


Y’all not going to believe this. I got two different comments by email after my “Leaner” post asking me if I felt the picture was appropriate. [1]And for the record, it was not coworkers. Lawd, they should know better by now.  I’m barely back on my game here and some folks feel the need to tell me my business.  All I can say, “Gurl, bye!”

I enjoy knowing folks read my madness. I try to be humble and gracious. And while I appreciate readers, no one forces you to come here. No one forces you to read or view my content. You see it because at some point you chose to do so. My picture was slightly R-rated only because I had a towel over my groin area. If you are offended seeing my legs and belly, you don’t belong here. For clarity in this particular pic, I used the towel because I like to wear loose shorts and the original pic looked way more R-rated. lol And, if I want to post those as well, I will.

And you should probably expect more of those pics honestly. I’m trying to hold myself more accountable on my fitness these days. I do that by seeing my progress in pics. As I pull back more from social media, I’ll probably end up posting more content here. [2]I guess it’s good they don’t have access to other parts of my blog. LOL Granted, I haven’t updated that in years, but still. Those pearls need clutching apparently At the end of the day, if my content bothers you, then you shouldn’t come here.



1 And for the record, it was not coworkers. Lawd, they should know better by now.
2 I guess it’s good they don’t have access to other parts of my blog. LOL Granted, I haven’t updated that in years, but still. Those pearls need clutching apparently


So I’m the leanest I’ve been in about a decade. I’m not doing anything extraordinary just trying to eat better and change my eating habits. I don’t eat terrible per se, we just tend to eat out a lot. I shared the pic on my IG so you’ve probably already seen it, but I’m still focused on trying to lose another 10-15 lbs.

While I’m always struggling to get a little more muscle and a little less fat, it’s not based on feeling insecure. Overall, I’m happy with my size. As I age, I feel itt’s more important than ever to keep myself healthy. Working out keeps me fit and sane. I went nuts not being able to workout during COVID.

Instead of forcing myself to do a day of cardio as part of my routine, I added an extra high intensity core exercise to the end of my daily workouts. Surprisingly it seems to be paying off. I loathe doing cardio as I just get bored more.thjs anything. This method helps overcome that.

i wouldn’t mind seeing some abs eventually but again, I’m not driven for that. Being ab-adjacent is more than fine with me.


Well, I got several emails after my last post asking about my back. It’s definitely better. The condition itself hasn’t changed but the last procedure was very successful at reducing my pain.

I now have to actively maintain my stretching and strength exercises or it goes south again quickly. As mentioned, the cartilage around two of my discs has atrophied mostly due to age. This has caused the two discs to occasionally rub together, which is what led to the muscle spasms. I do exercises to keep the back and legs from tightening up and to keep fluid flowing to keep the discs apart. It’s surprisingly effective…as long as I keep doing it. Lol [1]There’s always a catch right?

Randomly it can become agitated and flare up but overall it’s been manageable. Walking or standing for long periods of time definitely sets it off. It sucks getting old. I’ll be glad when we conquer stuff like this so age isn’t such a curse at times. I can only imagine if it was worse. *crossed fingers*

It’s become my new normal so it rarely upsets me anymore. I’ve resigned myself to the fact I am indeed mortal. 😂


1 There’s always a catch right?


So….. I’m not dead. 😂. I’ve been distracted and I actually got locked out of my own blog for awhile. I didn’t get hacked. I somehow suspended my incoming email account and this caused the WordPress software to freak out and lock me out. I’m self hosted so I can’t email someone else to ask for a reset. I’m usually that contact, as the owner / administrator.

I knew the gist of how to get back in I just kept putting it off. I finally sat down and got it all sorted and I’m back in. For clarity, none of my site data was lost or compromised.

Of course, half-assing it I screwed up my main installation by not updating my php version before updating a plugin. This in turn caused the whole site to fail. I then had to look up how to log into my php to reset the plugins to null. Lolol. I finally got my shot together and got it all sorted.

Yes I’m still here.