Month: June 2011

Hip Hop

If you’ve been following me on twitter or Facebook, you know Spike hasn’t been doing so well the last few days. He woke up the other morning and his hip was really bothering him. Poor thing, while he was trying to pee (lift his leg) he lost his balance and fell down. It would have been comical had I not been so sad. He turned and looked at me like I’d done something to him. It took him a few minutes to realize he was having issues. I promptly freaked out, got really upset, and almost started crying. [1]Yes, I cry. I’m a typical Aquarian in that I’m very emotional  He got thru it and I actually carried him upstairs. Not because he couldn’t make it on his own, I was afraid he might irritate his already unsteady hip.

Hip dysplasia is a very common ailment for English bulldogs and Spike being almost 9 (in just 2 short months) I guess its good that its taken this long to manifest. All of Spike’s siblings have passed away already according to Apple guy. I guess it was only a matter of time before Spikey succumbed to something. Luckily, he seems to be on the mend. He is limping a lot less and we are massaging and stretching his leg daily. At this point, we’re only trying non-invasive treatments. I’ve put him on a glucosamine regimen that he will remain on permanently, either thru his food or treats. I’m hoping rest and supplements are enough right now as I don’t have a lot of extra cash at the moment. If this doesn’t work, I’ll look at steroidal/arthritis supplements as well. It seems in Bullies dysplasia and arthritis go hand in hand.  Often the dysplasia increases the arthritis symptoms.

As I mentioned, he is doing better. I’ve been keeping his outside walks very short and he seems to be responding. He’s been putting more weight on it and walking around more and more like normal every day. We broke out his heating pad again [2]under his bedding to help keep his him warm at night and during his many naps. Keep your fingers crossed by the end of this week he’ll be almost back to normal. Sadly, this means he won’t get to go on as many walks. He loves to go out and I’ll have to come up with ways to get him out w/o overworking his hip. I have no problem getting him a red Flyer wagon and dragging him around in it. lol He would totally love it too. The problem would be keeping him in it. His eagerness and excitement is unabated and he loves attention.

I’m not prepared to think worst case scenario right now. I’m still shocked at how attached I’ve become. I grew up on a farm. I raised livestock and pets and never felt this much angst. The very thought of losing him drives me to tears. I love that damn dog and my life just won’t be the same without him.  And no, I have no desire to replace him now or later. If and when he does get to that point there will be absolutely no discussion of replacing him.

References

References
↑1 Yes, I cry. I’m a typical Aquarian in that I’m very emotional
↑2 under his bedding

GHHD

Well gay fans, Gay High Holy Day #1 (aka Pride) is here. This weekend promises to be a doozey as the weather is nice. Instead of blathering on about the need for gay holidays, pride, etc this year I thought I’d just wish everyone a happy and safe Pride weekend. I figure if you don’t know by know why we still need such events, your obviously living under a rock somewhere.  Whether you’re out in a major way or just going about your daily life, take a moment to look back on how far we’ve come and the road still ahead.

I’ll be out and about. I don’t have any concrete plans other than the Pink party on Saturday and the festival on Sunday. I’m sure shenanigans will ensue at some point but you know I’m not one to gossip. Lol   I’m dirt poor at the moment but thankfully the event is mostly free. I won’t be doing any big parties or that sort of thing.

So as I said, whether you’ll be tooting it up or having a quiet evening at home, reflect for a moment and be proud of who/what you are. Know that you are not alone and that across the country you’re brethren, who were born ‘a little different’ just like you, are celebrating our freedoms.

Have a safe and happy Pride weekend all.

Pinch Me

Jimbo had a rant about fake bloggers the other day on his blog so I thought I’d weigh in. I must admit, its been a long time since anyone called me a fake here. I guess partly because I don’t blog as much as I used to. I also post so much of myself online, you have to be a bloody idiot to think I’m a fake. lol  I’ve blogged before about fakes but I figure its worth repeating.

Anyway, I got a kick out of all the outrage that people were blathering on about. Really? You’re shocked that someone is posing as someone else online? You obviously don’t get out enough. Yeah, I get why people are upset but you have to temper that with a bit of reason. People effin’ lie! They’ve been doin it for centuries and this new fangled interweb thingy just makes it that much easier. I liked that Jimbo ranted about the old AO-Hell [1]my moniker for the ever shitty AOL. The only company that I ever said has customer service worse than AT&Tdays. The fakes back then were fast and free and it was almost an art form to be able to separate the real from the fake. With a little bit of patience and objectivity, it really is easy to spot the fakes. Let little ole me edumacate you in the process. (I’m referring to personal blogs of everyday people.)

Rule #1 and the most important axiom to follow. As my maw-maw always said, ‘believe none of what you hear, and half of what you see.’ That just means if it sounds to good to be true, it usually is. Or at the very least, you should proceed with caution until you know for sure.

Pictures are a tried and true give away. People who chronicle their lives thru blogs naturally enhance their blogging thru pictures/videos. Pics/videos also evolve over time as people do. This is a big one for me personally. If I stumble over a personal blog with no pictures of the blogger, I’m already wary.

If the blogger has to go to great lengths to convince you they are real, they probably aren’t. I had one faker try to use me as ammo once because we had interacted online for awhile. I guess he thought I’d vouch for him. Considering I’d never met said person and only seen one self-pic, I took him with a grain of salt. When he tried to drag me into the blog war, I quickly let him know I wouldn’t be vouching for anyone I’d never seen in person. He then tried to act all hurt. Bless his heart.

Disclosure: I myself got suckered once, big time. I’m happy to admit it. I got hoodwinked partly because I wanted to believe the person was real. I ignored some of the small cues that gave it away. In the end someone else, out of bitterness which I also didn’t approve of, exposed the fake. It would have come out eventually but the way it did was messy and had a very nasty ripple effect.

So there you have it. If you can use my methodology above, you’ll have a hard time getting suckered.

To be fair, I still read a couple blogs that I know are fake. I find the blog( s ) entertaining and as long as they don’t hurt anyone, who am I to judge? [2]One of them I’ve been reading almost as long as I’ve been blogging. And no, don’t ask me cause I’m not trying to stir up drama for anyone else.  And at the end of the day, that is the final distinction for me. If someone perpetrates harm then I’m having none of it and all for exposing them for the liars they are. But I also realize not everyone is comfortable being themselves, even in an online scenario. We have artists/authors who perform under alias all the time.  Omission is still lying. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not condoning lying. Its pointless and often leads to grief. But I also don’t act all self-righteous every time I discover someone is a fake. Nor do I go on a witch hunt. I wish everyone was as bluntly honest as I am but sadly, it just ain’t so. I live/act how’d I’d like the world to be but I also realize I can’t control others.  For you few long time readers, you know I’m all about distinctions. Some distinctions, however subtle, are the most important.

References

References
↑1 my moniker for the ever shitty AOL. The only company that I ever said has customer service worse than AT&T
↑2 One of them I’ve been reading almost as long as I’ve been blogging. And no, don’t ask me cause I’m not trying to stir up drama for anyone else.

Learn-ed

I took an instructor development class a couple weeks ago as part of my CE [1]continuing education requirements for work. I bring it up because there was a hottie in the class that I totally kept staring out. Totally straight but oh mah gawd was he hawt!

He turned out to have a bit of an ego (naturally). Ever notice how you can pick up someone’s body language and they don’t realize they are doing it? That’s called body leakage. [2]Get your minds out of my gutter He kept giving little signals that he was annoyed during his critic sessions. I know the instructors picked up on it because they always seemed to go overboard with trying to reassure him. hehehe

Anyway, I actually learned some things. I’ve always considered myself a good instructor but I did learn a few things that I think will definitely help. Some of the techniques seem obvious now even though I’d never really thought of’em before. The hands-on was excellent and I thought the critics of me were dead-on. One being I have a habit of speaking really fast. I often reinforce my teaching but speaking fast can often leave someone behind when they are struggling. 

On the other side of the coin, I will say some of the instruction was a bit too PC. It seemed to put instruction ahead of behavior issues. Not sure I agree with that. I can understand the fine balance  between the two and keeping an unruly student involved but at some point no amount of instruction will overcome a student’s negative behavior.

Anyway, it was a nice break from work even though I had to be up at butt-thirty early in the morning for class. By Thursday, my brain had pretty much shut down. Thankfully, it was all mostly hands-on at that.

References

References
↑1 continuing education
↑2 Get your minds out of my gutter

Fibber

Ever have someone lie right to your face? Even better, the person has no idea you already know their lying? lol  Then when you confront them, they make pathetic, out-of-character excuses that are hysterical.

I’d love to hear stories on similar cases.

Decade

So I’ve been in SF 10 whole years now. Wow, does the time fly! I mean it seems just like yesterday that I was making the pilgrimage to SF. I can scarcely believe it. I can remember packing up my little U-haul and heading West. It was a sunny (read “hot”) afternoon. I’d just come home from a very nice and somewhat tearful going-away party at my old job. My friend Michael had flown down to help me drive back. I said goodbye to my friend/roommate Trevan and took off for greener pastures never once looking back. I knew instinctively that I’d never be back [to live there].  I can also remember what a mess I was too. You few very long time readers can attest to that. Speaking of, I’m pushing 7 years on this here blog-thing. lol

To say I was a free spirit back then was an understatement! I moved around a lot as young adult. I never seemed to find myself. I honestly think without even realizing it I was looking for a place to call home. I never stayed long in one place and putting down roots was something to be avoided at all costs! I can remember one rather abrupt relationship I had gotten myself into. I woke up one day and thought to myself, ‘what the hell am I doing here?’ Of course, I’d moved for a guy. We met at a club and two weeks later I was moving into his trailer. [1]Did I mention I was a mess? lol Six months after that, I realized I wasn’t happy with him, my location, or my dead-end job. Had it not been for the sex I doubt it would have even lasted that long. I promptly up and moved the next day, albeit without his knowledge. The great thing about having no roots is you have very little to worry about when you move. Needless to say, I didn’t always make the best decisions back then either. Years later, I did make amends to the guy. Not that it mattered, he had quickly replaced me with someone younger and ditsier two weeks after I left. Clearly, he wasn’t all that heart-broken. Anyway, I think that was the first time I’d realized that a lot of the drama in my life was self-induced.

I admit my world view back then was somewhat limited. I was very naïve and had no clue for the most part. lol I acted on instinct and desire. But like it or not, Houston did have some roots for me. It was always a safe-haven when my latest attempt to “find myself” fell apart. It wasn’t until I moved to SF that I actually felt like I wouldn’t need it anymore. Don’t get me wrong, there will always be things about Houston, and the South in general, that I miss but SF is home for me now. Who knows if it will stay home but that’s definitely a topic for another day. Of course, we either have till October 2011 or 2012, depending on which nutjub is prophesying our destruction next. Regardless, I’ve been here 10 years and still feel very much at home.

I look at the person I was then and now and I’m amazed in the differences. The blog has helped so much I can’t even count the number of times. That and learning to look outside my little box and be proactive vs reactive. Ironically, I still look to the future with a sense of wonder. I don’t see my life as locked or unchangeable. While I do get a bit bogged down at times, I still see the future as something to look forward to. I think on some level, I used to be afraid if I ever settled down I’d become boring. Luckily, I’ve learned boring and stability do not have to be the same thing!

References

References
↑1 Did I mention I was a mess? lol

Assume The Position

On a recent ride, I found it somewhat amusing when a riding buddy shocked an employee of a local and very busy biker hangout. Basically, the employee replied to a buddy’s comment about it being a nice day. The employee said something to the effect, “and the pretty girls.”  Well my (male) friend w/o even really thinking anything of it said, “and the pretty guys“. You could tell it was totally not the answer the employee was expecting! Now don’t get me wrong, he wasn’t ignorant or stupid, he was just surprised. He didn’t break stride or even turn around. It was a very subtle but obvious change in his movements that gave him away. It also cracked me the hell up! This leads me into my post today.

My assumption is that because we were motorcycle riders, he naturaly assumed we were straight. Of course, I get that it ties into Western society’s over-emphasis on male/fem characteristics, hobbies, etc. But that’s a way deeper well to dive into on some other day…

Anyway, it struck me as noteworthy because I’ve become so accustomed to my openness about being gay.  I just so rarely think about it in a public forum anymore. I always just assume anyone who meets me knows I’m gay. I make no pretense about it how could they not know? [Insert joke here]   It still surprises me when someone doesn’t pick up on it. ( On an unrelated side note, this begs the question about gays learning to pick up on said subtle clues more astutely than our straight counter-parts.)

Of course, I’d forgotten that perception can be a powerful thing. I’m sure you’ve heard the old adage, ‘perception is 9/10’s of reality.‘   Well, case and point. lol  The human brain becomes hard-wired to expect certain actions, in this case behaviors. It will often (given time and/or more cues) pick up on subtle, out-of-the-norm differences, sometimes consciously, sometimes not. I’m sure given more time to observe us, the employee would have figured it out. 😉  Ironically, now that I think back on it, I can remember several rides where the same thing has occurred.

My buddy and I got a nice chuckle out it nonetheless. And we continued to cruise guys.