Category: dating

Random Tidbits

Lets see, not much to report today. Mostly random crap that I feel worth mentioning.

First, Republic of T had a great post regarding the Shiavo case and the Democrats total lack of a voice during the whole process. While I’m normally of the mindset that the “christian-not-right” drive more people to my side than against with all their madness, it would be nice if more than a few Dems. would grow a spine and voice an opinion once and awhile. As I’m writing this, I am thinking originally the Democrats probably thought it was a non-issue and the fact that the republicans latched onto it w/such fervor caught them completely by surprise. As a result, the Dems. are caught w/their jaw open staring in total disbelief at the sheer ignorance of the republican party. Well, thats my hope anyway.

The BCC contest this past Thursday went well. We got 3 more really good contestants. *I’ll have photos of the contest posted by Sunday on the BCC site. There are two more preliminaries to go before the finals so any of you locals who are having thoughts of making a go of it, get off your duff and get down to The Powerhouse next Thursday. You can even download an application to compete here.

TH’s family is in town for the weekend so I won’t get any solo time w/him until at least Monday. I know it is selfish to want him all to myself but at least someone I know has good family ties.

Roblog is doing a bit better in his drama as of late. I’m very happy to hear that. I’m trying to squeeze in another lunch in w/him so we can catch up.

I think I discovered a way to create a static html/php page using a plugin I found for WordPress. WTF you say? Static just means its one page instead of several. It would make it much easier for me to copy/past code into the layout of the new template. Thats is kind of low priority right now but I promise I’ll eventually get to it.

I’ve been hitting the gym sporadically but I’m almost back into my normal routine. I’ve lost some strength all over but not as much as I had feared. I got a nice pump today from my chest workout and that put me in a good mood. *G* The eye candy today was better than usual as well.

I was released on the fire side at work which means I can work solo over there now. *We are in the process of taking over dispatching from the Fire Dept.* The down side to that means I’ll be back on the PD side Monday and no more getting off early.

I think thats about it. No deep thoughts today. Just sort in the moment.

Multiple Dating

I cross posted this from my tribe. I got some great and honest responses so I thought I’d post here as well and see what you folks think.

So heres a question. Can you or do you date more than one guy at the same time?

I’ve never been able to pull it off successfully. I know in the straight world it seems perfectly acceptable to have multiple suitors until one is chosen. However, I always end up feeling guilty and two-faced and it ALWAYS seems to happen to me.

I met a really nice guy a week or so back and we’ve just begun getting to know each other. I then run into another guy at the gym and we hit it off as well. Now the second guy wants to start dating as well.

Of course, TH is the one I was referring to. And if I had to go just on looks, I’d go for TH as he just does it for me in that area.

I probably over analyzing it but I made a promise to myself this year that I would take care of me first. Should I play the field and see whats out there? I usually just end up feeling so damned guilty as if I’m cheating. My best friend T usually says, “unless there is a ring on my finger, I’m still single and that means I can go out w/whoever.” Well, true but I’m not built that way.

This sorta goes back to my “Good Man” post. I try to be a good guy because I know thats what I want in return. And I wouldn’t want some guy I’m into two-timing w/someone else. And for clarity, I’m not referring to sex. Sex is so easy to find in this city. Its like pizza, you can go online and order in. I’m talking about the emotional aspects.

I’ve already made up my mind on how I plan to proceed but I’d love some feedback. (Write it down folks, Moby is actually ASKING for help!)

I Still Got It!

I can report the date w/TH (the hottie) went great. I had a busy day so I was a bit rushed by the time rolled around. We ended up at Catch in the Castro which is one of my favorite restaurants. He has a great sense of humor which I found very appealing. I love a guy who can let go and laugh at himself as well as the world around him. He also has this adorable little scar behind his cheekbone that I kept wanting to kiss all thru dinner. Most people wouldn’t have even noticed but I have this thing for tiny scars. It was very distracting. Add to that he was very attentive, charming, and sweet throughout the evening and I came away feeling things I haven’t felt in awhile.

I was a bit nervous at first. We had the ex talk so he knows I’m a bit “vulnerable” right now. [1]I get such a giggle thinking of myself as vulnerable but its more or less true He isn’t really trying to rush it so I soon settled into being my normal terribly incorrigible self so everything worked out great.

The only other odd thing has to do w/me. I have this completely unconscious habit of focusing a conversation on myself. I have no control over it until I notice it and then sort of try to cool it. I have no idea why I do it but I caught myself a couple times and so finally I shared it w/him. We got a nice laugh out of it and he seemed to like it. He got high marks for that. *g*

References

References
↑1 I get such a giggle thinking of myself as vulnerable but its more or less true

Whew!

I’m tired. I’ve been on the go all day and time for a break. I had lunch w/the ex this morning. We caught up on the usual stuff. He was sorry to hear about my dad passing.

Afterwards, I was off to my first executive board meeting as a newly elected Union member. The exec. board meets once every 2 months to go over Union wide issues, vote, etc. It lasted approximately 3 hours. The one good part was I got to get up and address the entire room regarding conditions at our local chapter, my work. Rarely, being at a loss for words, I gave a pretty quick, direct speech on where we were as a new chapter, what we hoped to accomplish, and advised the membership body of how poorly we’ve been treated/paid. Quite a few people had questions and even more came up to me after it was over saying how invigorating my speech was. Well, I love to toot my horn and nothing gets it loud like a crisis. Needless to say, I got the message across. And I got a nice stipend for showing up too!

Now, I’m gonna try and sneak off to the gym. I have a date tonight and I’m excited. We met at the BCC contest this past Thursday and I couldn’t help but flirt w/him. He seemed mutually inclined so here we are. I never could resist a set of pretty eyes and flashing smile. Both of which, TH (the hottie) has in abundance. This will be the first date I’ve gone on since the break up so I’m a bit nervous. I’ll try to keep my mouth shut and just look pretty.

More later….

Opening a Can of Worms?

So much to cover today and so little time! I think I’ll do individual posts instead of one big one.

First the long one. I sorta opened a can of worms this week. To understand, you probably need a refresher on previous drama. This all comes into play right when I started blogging so not a lot of the story is complete. Yes, it involves the ex but only in a previous context. No, its not me moping again. I think I’m finally beyond that.

Preface: The ex moved in w/me mid 2003, he got really sick right after that w/pancreatitis. So sick in fact, he almost died. Skipping forward 6 months, he finally got better. He’d lost a lot of weight though. So one of his goals was to try to get back in shape enough to try out for the SOMA Bare Chest Calendar contest. It’s a charity event held every year that raises money for local AIDS charities, two specifically. I thought this a great idea and was very supportive. Naturally, he won and was the month of May for the 2004 Calendar. Skipping forward again, the calendar had an indirect impact on our breakup so I tend to have mixed feelings about it. However, I’m a big believer in charity so in the beginning I offered my web design services for free to help out. It was put to me that someone else was doing it and my help was not needed.

Current: I ran into one of the calendar committee members this past week at Daddybucks [1]Starbucks for those not in the know in the Castro. I’ll admit I’m a little sweet on him but that’s another story. *g* So, we start talking and I offered some very frank yet constructive advice on problems w/the previous year’s strategies. He was very accepting of the advice and agreed. So one thing led to another and a few emails later he asked if I’d be willing to help out on the committee, the web design, or both. I was truly flattered and felt a bit guilty for being a bit negative about the calendar previously. (yeah, I can be a caddy gossipy queen but I’m working on it, alright?) It’s not really their fault my ex and I broke up so to hold them partly accountable is a bit irrational. While my schedule is not flexible enough for me to be a full time committee member it is flexible enough for me to help out on the website. After a bit soul searching, I agreed. One, I enjoy it and it gives me a great way to meet people. Two, I like being in the background as far as charities are concerned. Being a very social creature, I have an unconscious habit of focusing people on me. That is never good for a charity so I like to take back seat roles to prevent that from happening. Three, this is a way for me to make up for my previous negativity. I have no desire to be on the Calendar itself for a variety of reasons. (we won’t go there)

Now here comes the catch. Between my first conversation and agreeing to do it, one of my old bosses emailed me wanting me to help them redo their company website as well. They are paying of course and their demands are a bit high. I just hope I haven’t bitten off more than I can chew. The calendar just wants updates more than anything which is relatively easy so I’m not thinking it will be a problem. However, I did sort of offer to redo the entire site originally. While it would not take all of my resources it would make me a very busy boy for awhile. I’m hoping they relegate me to just menial tasks of doing updates. The irony is I normally detest such a role and that was part of the reasoning behind my original refusal.

I’m still trying to find the lesson in all of this. I know there is one in there somewhere. *digging profusely*

References

References
↑1 Starbucks for those not in the know

Blech

I’m not feeling well today. I came home last night w/sore throat. Today, the sore throat is just a dull throb but, I’m feeling irritable and cranky so decided to stay home. No gym today either. I find that if I cut back on my exertions up front, I tend to recover a lot quicker. I hope it doesn’t get any worse. I’m fortunate in that I rarely get sick. But when I do, OY vey! And to top it off, I’m a miserable sick person. I turn into a cranky toddler who wants everything now now NOW!

Of course, going out w/a friend drinking last night didn’t help any. However, he seems to have developed a stalker of sorts and needed some advice so how could I say no? *g*

So anyway, there is this little Thai place down the block from me, Before & After. They have the best seafood noodle soup. YUMMY! Maybe afterwards I’ll take in a movie. I still haven’t seen Darkness, White Noise, or National Treasure. None of which have made box office news but that’s never the point of going to a movie. It’s times like these I’m thankful I live in such a densely populated area of the city. Everything is within blocks.

On a side note, my ex finally got a job. (Tell it on the mountains, call down the saints!) He actually starts today.

Meanderings

Today was a nice day off. I’ve learned to appreciate my days off more and more these days. Got up late, had lunch w/the ex and did a few errands together, met a nice stud for an afternoon slough and now just hanging out watching the world go by.

Morning: Most of it spent goofing off being lazy around the house. Finally, got my lazy carcass over to the gym around 11:30. Today was originally back day but I switched and did shoulders. No real reason, just felt like doing shoulders today. Mr. Hottie was there and I ignored him completely. Ok, well completely is the wrong word. Afterwards, he came into the steam room where I was laid out relaxing and I made sure to get a stiffy before leaving. (Yes, I can be a spiteful bastard at times)

Early afteroon: I decided to have lunch in the Castro after checking the mail. The ex came by and we had a nice lunch together. I discovered he is dating someone new. I’m not sure how serious it is as he was obviously uncomfortable talking about it. Surprisingly, I didn’t feel upset or hurt at all. I’m not sure its wise to be dating someone so soon but who am I to be giving him advice on relationships. It pains me to know that I’m not the one for him but I’ve also realized that maybe he isn’t the one for me. I deserve to be treated better than I was and I didn’t have to convince myself this time by rehashing all the reasons why. I’ve had some time to grieve and my head and heart are beginning to agree with each other as far as he is concerned. I’m digressing again. We had a nice lunch, caught up on “the stuff” going on in our lives and we ended up doing a few errands together. It was nice just hanging out w/him as a friend. He seemed very at ease as well.

Late Afternoon: Met a fellow thru an online site (which will remain nameless) and we had a nice romp. For a change he was everything he said he was and then some. The connection was powerful which made it that much better. (No, I won’t go into the details. However, I’ve thought of starting another blog for such matters, whaddya think?)

Evening: There is a nice new french bakery/coffee shop in the Castro, the Le Bon Gateau, which is becoming one of my favorite haunts. They have free wifi but more importantly, its setup to relax. They have a mixture of hard top tables w/bar stool style chairs along w/some very comfy couches. Much more of a relaxing atmosphere than the very sterile a-typical style Starbucks just around the corner. Starbucks ain’t bad but it just doesn’t have that “come on in” feeling to it. I’m digressing again, shit. Ok, back on topic so I’m hanging out and I bump into a friend of the ex. We had a nice coversation over him working and me net surfing.

So overall its been a good day. No stress, no drama, very relaxed and friendly. Just the way I like it.

Lunch date

Starting the new year off w/a bang, I had a lunch date today. A very nice one at that. He was everything he said he was and actually looked like his pics. [1]tell it on the mountain! I get so annoyed w/guys here using pics of themselves 10-20 years & 40-50lbs ago. We met at a local joint in the castro. It was muggy/cold today but I needed to get out of the house anyway so made for a good excuse. Not only was he personable but he was sweet, approachable, and seemed really at ease chatting. He didn’t have his guard up and didn’t put on “airs” as to being some stuck up fag which was great. I am probably the most unpretentious person you could ever meet. I never understand pretentious people. All that work for a fascade, no thanks we are all stocked up here on drama.

I had a good time and I was a horrible flirt. (surprise) Started my day out in a good mood.

References

References
↑1 tell it on the mountain! I get so annoyed w/guys here using pics of themselves 10-20 years & 40-50lbs ago.